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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Wishingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Toxic Rose
    Elite Ratio:    5.82 - 159/220/97
    Words: 120
    Class/Type: Poetry/Being a Teen
    Total Views: 538
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 862



    Description:
       This goes back and forth a couple of times from three- and four-lined stanzas. The threes are on the surface... the fours are underneath.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsWishingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    What is it you see when you look at me?

    Pent-up energy, smothered feelings
    Impossible rage, oblivious determination
    A flood of emotions begging to be set free.

    Nothing lasts forever
    So I'll cherish what I've got
    How could I listen to my mind
    When my heart is breaking apart?

    Unchanging as the sea,
    Ceaseless as the wind-
    A young girl's will, fighting for domination.

    These eyes are filled with wonder
    This soul bursting with fright
    My life wavering in the wind
    All instincts scrambling for the light.

    One wand'ring child, alone in the wilderness
    In the cold unfeeling light, silent and resigned-
    Staring upon a scene of breathtaking beauty
    Wishing, wanting- simply to be seen.




    Submitted on 2005-11-28 20:24:13     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I think this is a good description of how everyone feels at different times , not just teens. :) I liked the "These eyes are filled with wonder,This soul bursting with fright, My life wavering in the wind, All instincts scrambling for the light." I feel that you will be one of the rare ones who remembers and uses these feelings all your life to be more aware and compassionate.
    | Posted on 2005-11-29 00:00:00 | by BLee | [ Reply to This ]
      Pent-up energy, smothered feelings
    Impossible rage, oblivious determination
    A flood of emotions begging to be set free.

    This sums it up. Teenage life. It is tough at first, but it gets better. You have your ups and downs, ins and outs. Teenage life is exciting and new and confusing and painful all at the same time. I loved your choice of words and I think you gave the readers a glimpse of teenage life.
    | Posted on 2005-11-29 00:00:00 | by evey36 | [ Reply to This ]
      I read this and thought to myself how insightful this teen is. I have five children and have been through the teens years four times.
    You have a keen insight to your emotions as a teen. The teen years are probably the most
    emontional times in our entire life. The changes that occur and the emotions that are unleashed are relentless.
    Teens are hard to understand.

    I realized this with my daughters and son.
    None of them had the same problems or same dreams but each were unique. That is what we as parents and adults have to understand.

    You as a teen also have to realize that not all adults will understand your emotions.
    By communicating as you are now by writing this piece is a start.

    I admire your ability to see this in yourself.

    Enjoy these years because they only happen once.

    Great write and be happy. (You are seen)

    Respect and Admiration

    Clyde
    | Posted on 2005-11-28 00:00:00 | by Wisdom Seeker | [ Reply to This ]


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