Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
    • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
    • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Dead and gone (never again)dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: lucianraven
    ASL Info:    21/M/Spfld Il
    Elite Ratio:    3.46 - 49/67/19
    Words: 73
    Class/Type: Rant/Venting
    Total Views: 943
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 573



    Description:
       If you read the description for "blood and tears" you'll get it.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDead and gone (never again)dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Anger ,
    blood and tears,
    form a rock
    A glowing coal of hate
    Within my very soul
    Fists clenched with rage
    Pale blue frightened eyes
    Screams, unheard
    Mercy, ungiven
    Cold, calcuated action
    Bruises
    Pain
    Scars unseen
    Wounds unhealed
    Fear undefeatable
    A sweet, brave young girl
    never again
    who i once knew
    dead and gone
    replaced by shame
    by fear
    by guilt
    who i once knew
    dead and gone

    Dedicated to Zuri




    Submitted on 2005-11-29 19:08:49     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      you write some many poems that are full of depth and pain, i hope your future brightens, i thought the way you layed oyt this piece, suited it very well, as you couldn't really put the words into stanza's, the words you used replyed over and over in my mind especially these lines... screams, unherd. mercy, ungiven. wonderful lines.
    ++My Pain++
    | Posted on 2005-12-12 00:00:00 | by my pain | [ Reply to This ]
      This is an incredible write from a young mine
    I dont know if it was the feeling you were going for but to me
    this write
    Was about someone who was looking at the male and female traits they have inside

    This write was very thought provoking
    Great Job!
    Take Care
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-11-30 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      This is an incredible write from a young mine
    I dont know if it was the feeling you were going for but to me
    this write
    Was about someone who was looking at the male and female traits they have inside

    This write was very thought provoking
    Great Job!
    Take Care
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-11-30 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?    		7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    82801

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Devils in the Details written by endlessgame23
    Break Up written by WriteSomething
    Skin of Fables written by ShadowParadox
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    The Promise written by annie0888
    In the Mouth of Elysium written by HisNameIsNoMore
    This written by Chelebel
    Push written by JanePlane
    May 31 2018 written by Chelebel
    The Song on Your Guitar written by SavedDragon
    Wish written by Daniel Barlow
    Sunset written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Trails written by Daniel Barlow
    Once Again written by krs3332003
    Red Barn written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Linger written by saartha
    Pain, an elixir. written by Ramneet
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    102.3 written by rev.jpfadeproof
    Hollow Points written by RequiemOfDreams
    Fathoms of the Lullaby Sea written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    Pressure written by hybridsongwrite
    A Sonnet for Nina written by SavedDragon
    Giving written by jjd
    What happens written by Wolfwatching
    Deaf Dumb and Blind is no excuse written by poetotoe
    It's Night Now written by RisingSon
    In My Head written by faideddarkness

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry