[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: STILL HEREdots

    Author: solemnpen
    ASL Info:    18
    Elite Ratio:    4.02 - 303/339/42
    Words: 180
    Class/Type: Lyrics/Misc
    Total Views: 1001
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1147

       say nahlij... take what you want man, or tell me if you want something else..

    to everybody who cares to read what i submit..

    sorry it has took so long.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSTILL HEREdots

    drunk ass fiend, back in the scene
    back to the streets, back to this forum
    bottle of heinessy, tripping alarms
    looking over my shoulder
    ready to drop a bomb
    beats running through my head
    lyrics biting at the bit
    like a ticking time bomb
    DYR through dem bos
    bitch slap dez hoes
    riding two miles an hour
    dis shit is so sour
    forgive me for splitting yo girls flower

    we got this niggas we aint went nowhere
    we got this shit our pens aint disappeared
    we got this shit let's ride
    2 cocked and clicked, let it spit

    Like a nigga in the clan
    sticking out like a sore thumb
    a treasure rarely scene
    a white boy from the ghetto scene
    riding with yakuza
    ill have you begging for your life
    with a bend of my thumb
    steel is replaced by the pen
    to reach all you bitches across
    the motherfucking globe
    Don't make a scene
    as you see us ride by
    With the sum of your bank account
    hanging from our earlobes

    DYR baby

    Submitted on 2005-11-30 10:17:37     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Mad hot again. The only thing...don't get me wrong from this...I flow too...as you already know...some blacks could get offended my a white rapper spittin the word nigga. *shrugs* I'm not taking it the wrong way...but I know how some people work...especially because I am the only white person that lives where I live...and the only white person out of all of my friends. They don't let it bother them if a hispanic or any other interracial...minority..says that...but for just any white to say it...they do.

    I give you mad props for this. I really do. But, Li Li will always keep it real. ALWAYS.

    Much love boy!

    Keep it up.

    | Posted on 2005-12-05 00:00:00 | by Munchie_1226 | [ Reply to This ]
      Yeah, that was hot. I really got into the rhythm of the lyrics. It's a good thing for a reader to be able to nod their head and feel what you're saying. The only thing is that you need to revise this. You had a few grammatical errors, and I'm not talking about the slang words. I'm talking about Hennessy. How in the hell can yo uspell Hennessy wrong. Hennessy hennessy hennessy hennessy hennessy hennessy hennessy hennessy hennessy! See, it ain't that hard. Oh and work on the rhyme. But, good [censored] anyway.
    | Posted on 2005-12-05 00:00:00 | by FoxxyRoxxanne | [ Reply to This ]
      welcome back. it's been a while homie. i see u still got it and yeah i agree. dyr will rise from the ashes. we can't be stopped. i'm glad pj started this [censored]. good job cade. this [censored] was hot
    | Posted on 2005-11-30 00:00:00 | by unknown soldier | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]