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    dots Submission Name: Icy Portraitsdots

    Author: brokenroses
    ASL Info:    17/m/indiana
    Elite Ratio:    3.93 - 191/192/62
    Words: 44
    Class/Type: Poetry/Nature
    Total Views: 635
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 378

       make your own inferences. poetry is not to be spoonfed.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsIcy Portraitsdots

    Winter's chilling blast,
    Snowy swirls spray.
    From the rooftops above,
    And the sidewalks below.

    Winter wonderland,
    Filling every sense,
    With wonder and awe,
    With surprise and joy.

    Winter's hateful glare,
    Burning at my flesh,
    Freezing away my thoughts,
    And numbing every sense.

    Submitted on 2005-12-01 19:59:01     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Very cool indeed. I have a similar piece called No Sun. You really nailed the theme. You seem to like looking at winter but you don't enjoy its coldness. Its a strange look at winter, usually winter is made out epic and savage but you kept it simple. Well done

    - Sethesin
    | Posted on 2005-12-23 00:00:00 | by Sethesin | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this poem- it's pretty similar to the stuff I write and enjoy. I think one more verse is in order at the end. Does the winter win or are better days in the future coming? Looking forward to more like this!
    | Posted on 2005-12-04 00:00:00 | by Ravensworth | [ Reply to This ]
      I myself don't like poetry that uses lots of metaphors and you have to use a scalpel and magnifying glass to figure out. So I'll just take it as I see it, k?
    To me, this is like a relationship. At the start it's fun and pretty and all neato. Then it gets a little old, a little tired, then flat out irritating. Or it could just be about getting sick of snow..either way I like the visual here.
    Traci :)
    | Posted on 2005-12-02 00:00:00 | by onetruesmartass | [ Reply to This ]
      Human nature and Mother nature.
    Hmm, I would take a guess and say this is about how our emotions can plummet, climb, then plummet again, in mere seconds it seems.
    It's a good write about the blows of winter.. and the human side of it (or what I got from it) was interesting as well.
    | Posted on 2005-12-02 00:00:00 | by Intricate1 | [ Reply to This ]
      Ok I brought my own spoon. I guess you're writing of the chill of break-up, the icy feeling from head to toe, and the cold, ice-filled words that come between those that were lovers.

    If tat is correct, the center stanza doesn't really fit...so, if it's a poem about winter...it's ok, but nothing special.

    I don't mind being put on the right track, being the king of the putzes.

    be happy

    | Posted on 2005-12-01 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked it. It was a truthful poem. With feelings almost of its own. It has the brightness and the darkness in it that I associate with winter. I think that is why I liked it so well.
    | Posted on 2005-12-01 00:00:00 | by ThatWasOnceMe | [ Reply to This ]
      wow, i like it... but is there any possibility on one more stanza? between the 1st and the 2nd just felt like something was missing from there, like it jumped ahead. i love the contradicting stanza's 2 and 3 "filling every sense" and "numbing every sense"
    | Posted on 2005-12-01 00:00:00 | by thoughts | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this a lot, you show two dimensions of winter. The pretty side, and the cold side. I like to think of winter as unifying because everyone seems to be moving towards the same goal, which is to keep warm, and keep life moving, despite the freezing cold. I like Wewak's interpretation of the breakup whatnot, but if it's a poem of nature, I still like it. Peace and love. -rue
    | Posted on 2006-02-23 00:00:00 | by Rue | [ Reply to This ]

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