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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: deaddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: stateXofXmind
    ASL Info:    18/F
    Elite Ratio:    2.09 - 29/49/21
    Words: 104
    Class/Type: Misc/
    Total Views: 306
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 619



    Description:
       this one is about a woman whos loved one dies, and all shes left is the haunting memories that make her take her life to see him once again...thats about it


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsdeaddots
    -------------------------------------------


    In the day her heart turned cold and
    the twinkle in her eye semmed to fade,
    the smile on her face disappeared,
    and the song in her heart was a memory,
    a memory of a man she loved
    a man who was her world
    a man who died for her,for love
    In that day she has no world, no love
    just memories,
    memories of the times she cried as he held her,
    memories of their first kiss, first hello
    and their last goodbye...
    the memories that haunt her and
    tell her
    she says goodbye one more time,
    and hello once again
    dead...




    Submitted on 2005-12-02 08:26:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This write has a nice detailed meaning. A happy women, then widowed. The gloom of the poem is very exposed, as the suicide act in the end, i like this poem alot.
    | Posted on 2005-12-03 00:00:00 | by rAbit | [ Reply to This ]
      The poem sounded nice to me, it sounded lovely. This poem seems to take me into my side of sadness. It's so nice. You've got a nice way in writing StateXofXMind. The poem really speaks for itself indeed. Good job.
    | Posted on 2005-12-02 00:00:00 | by AnimeAssencion | [ Reply to This ]
      The poem itself had a nice edgy meaning to it, but you used commas way to much wich made me pause sometimes and re-read the poem. And when you write a poem you want the reader to keep reading. So if you were to fix that I believe it would be better than it already is.
    | Posted on 2005-12-02 00:00:00 | by Fadeintoreality | [ Reply to This ]


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