[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Soldiersdots

    Author: Autum-Moon
    ASL Info:    15/Female/drowing
    Elite Ratio:    3.22 - 284/165/29
    Words: 231
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 765
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1395

       What are you looking for in terms of feedback? Any background information behind the piece? Hints? Is this just to vent? Emotional state while writing?

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Soldiers with there heads hung high,
    And feet apone the ground.
    Even when love,
    Can not be found.

    Holding back tears,
    In a long hours fight.
    Watching friends die,
    In the darkest of night.

    Fighting a war,
    That is not there's.
    And do you think,
    The President cares?

    They left their familys,
    To fight this war.
    I don't understand,
    Whats it for?

    Their children crying,
    From their inocent eyes.
    Hoping their dad,
    Is not the one who dies.

    Wives at home,
    On their knees in prayer.
    Hoping god's listening,
    Hoping he's there.

    Now many soldiers lay dead,
    Row by row.
    Their blood spilt,
    To and frow.

    Now stones make,
    Where they lay.
    Because they went,
    To war that day.

    So I ask the president,
    To hear are crys.
    And to stop,
    His selfish lies.

    To stop the killing,
    Of inocent lives.
    And put down,
    The guns and knives.

    Let them go home,
    To their wives and children.
    That love them so,
    Please Mr. President,
    Let them go.

    Submitted on 2005-12-02 19:48:34     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      This was very honest in an innocent way & I liked that because grown people in control make a bigger mess of things and a lot of us wonder why?
    Good emotion and sincerity shining through this dedication to soldiers and their families!
    Love,Peace,Joy&Smiles 2 share
    | Posted on 2006-01-06 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]

    Great poem. The president does need to think more before war. There's alot of good lines in it, that portray the brutal truth about war.

    *Let it Flow*
    | Posted on 2005-12-14 00:00:00 | by Silent_Tears | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this poem. I feel the same way. I hate the fact that so many of our people are dying for the President ad that he just lets it happen. I hate that he just sits on his a** and does nothing while there are soldiers are losing their lives for his war. This is a good poem. Adding it to my favorites.
    | Posted on 2005-12-05 00:00:00 | by ImperfectGirl1 | [ Reply to This ]
      ya, what a lovely country we get lied to by those we elect and go to war over money insited by lies'. a good piece, perhaps just heard/that the same thing so many times that it doesn't quite hit the same. i like it, it gives a point yet still holds onto the emotion. take care
    | Posted on 2005-12-13 00:00:00 | by dismentled | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Sleep Talk written by Queen_of_spades
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (final) written by endlessgame23
    AI written by poetotoe
    Or are we written in the sand? written by Chelebel
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (4) written by endlessgame23
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Carry written by saartha
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Your Lover written by Cordell
    Cover written by saartha
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    Shi written by ShyOne
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    a safe place written by Daniel Barlow
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    You read free written by poetotoe
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne
    phantom limbs written by expiring_touch
    Formal Jen written by Daniel Barlow




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]