Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Anorexi-Part 2 rewrittendots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: elephantasia
    ASL Info:    37/F/UK
    Elite Ratio:    3.54 - 398/490/159
    Words: 156
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 682
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1103



    Description:
       WHich version do you prefer please.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsAnorexi-Part 2 rewrittendots
    -------------------------------------------


    In an alternative ending
    There was a new beginning.
    Listening to her bodys whisper
    echoing cries of a loved-starved spirit,
    she served herself compassion.

    Flavouring her soul
    with love and true affection
    found deep in her heart,
    rejection stopped.
    Self-mutilation ceased.
    Unpeeling layers
    and pouring out pungent grief,
    released an appetite for life.
    In a savouring of peace,
    realisation nourished a new recipe for living.

    Anorexia died then
    and out of darkness
    an inner well of light bubbled over
    stirring her into awakening.
    Imbibing the power of her own love
    she thirsted to heal herself.
    Tasting joy,
    she feasted on the wonder of life.

    Make a meal of loving yourself
    Let your body mirror the love in your heart
    Honour your divine spark.
    Grow and glow.
    Shine your light into the hearts of others
    So they too can see their inner light.
    We all have one you know!




    Submitted on 2005-12-05 07:23:41     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I like this write but i have to honestly say the First one showed a little more emotion
    I believe you wrote the first one with more feeling on the topic
    That is not to say this was not a good write
    Take Care
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-12-05 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow well done! This is really good, portraying the ugliness of anorexia but still giveing so much hope..i suffered with anorexia and know all too well the affects from the insidious disease...this would be a great piece for those in clinics recovering...if this is about you i am very pleased to hear of another that has overcome the illness..stormy
    | Posted on 2005-12-05 00:00:00 | by stormyskies | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    83364

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    Keep written by TheStillSilence
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    untitled written by Outlaw
    The World written by jjd
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    Day 5 written by TheStillSilence
    Deep written by Janesaddiction
    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Lie back & tan written by Daniel Barlow
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Loop-di-Loop written by endlessgame23
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    The Curtain Call written by faideddarkness
    no sky on the other side written by teika5
    Night- time written by Daniel Barlow
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    To the Artist written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Untitled written by Daniel Barlow
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Snippet written by Daniel Barlow
    Coversheets written by TheStillSilence
    Twin Intercept written by Daniel Barlow

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry