I need a helping a hand,
A friend to understand,
My life is making me insane,
Everything in it causes nothing but pain.
I long to disappear into the night,
Why can't i stay and fight?
The fight is to long and i would neverwin the war,
I'd prefer to be on the streets, broken and poor.
I can't live this life the way i should,
I'm not living it the way i should,
Past mistakes creep in and tear my heart,
All i need is a totally new start,
I advanced to fast,
It can't last.
I'm soon to break,
What a mistake.
If i died tomorrow, i think i'd be relieved,
The pain inside has to be felt to be believed,
It consumes my every waking minute,
Surely death isn't the answer, is it?
No-one will help me, I turned them all away,
My trust for people diminises further everyday,
They're all the same, only think of number one,
For me living in this life is no longer fun.
I screwed it all up somewhere along the way,
I slip further into my coffin every single day.
I'm turning sour with a bitter after taste, I'll be dead within the year if something doesn't happen with incredible haste.
I'm dying from the inside, slowly becoming hollow,
I have no pride left to show or swallow.
I'm down and soon to out,
I don't want to be here if this what life is about,
The choices i've made, all wrong!
Death beckons me and i feel it won't be long,
The reaper is round the corner sharpening his blade,
He's coming to take me for all the mistakes i've made,
I've tried to sort it out over the last year,
I can't find the way, I'm being consumed by my fear,
I don't sleep, I don't eat, I can't feel,
What kind of life is it, when i can't enjoy a good meal?
I'm sinking into depression and solitude,
I can't control my emotions, I can't control my mood.
The last time i smiled and felt happy, i don't know,
It's been tears since my true feelings have been able to flow,
Do you know how i know things are so wrong?
Because the poem i sit here writing is taking so bloody long.
To many thoughts and feelings to control,
There's to many to focus on any type of goal.
Even writing this it becomes more clear, death is an attractive cure,
So do i take the easy way out? Or do i try to endure
As yet no conclusion is clear,
All that's present is my crippling fear..... |
Submission Name: The Fear!
