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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Fantasy's Enddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Th_Plonk
    Elite Ratio:    6.38 - 41/41/10
    Words: 131
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 299
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 880



    Description:
       A common theme in fairy stories is the openness of the fairy realm to innocence and purity. Of course once you grow up you realize that this was merely a useful trick to make children more interested in the story and well behaved in general. Let's keep telling ourselves that.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsFantasy's Enddots
    -------------------------------------------


    Somewhere, far off and long ago
    When I was young and not so slow
    I used to see, beyond the trees
    the sudden flashes through the leaves

    The stars danced bright, without a lie
    the song of night, a song of sky
    came flutt'ring downwards through the wings
    as lightning bats danced silver rings
    from metal nests in Astranol,
    their strident voices cried "Don't go!"

    But I was transfixed by the sight
    as blackest lightning tore the night.
    I ran, I ran. The smell was sweet
    as flowers died beneath my feet.
    I tore the diamond spiderweb
    and crushed its gentle maker's head.
    With horror now I hid my face
    to enter the Forbidden Place....

    and there I saw the scarlet prince
    and I've been crazy ever since.




    Submitted on 2005-12-06 21:35:47     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      well done i like it it has a fairy tale element that is just sweet...but that bouncy rhyme dude seriuosly it was like cutesy like suess but very thought out...
    -Claire
    | Posted on 2005-12-12 00:00:00 | by dismal_s child | [ Reply to This ]
      Hee hee! I find this kinda humorous. I must say it is very well written and expressed. The flow here is marvelous and the rhyme is very good. An interesting little tale you have told here. The only question I have here is who is the scarlet prince? I am lost in the significance of that. But I did enjoy reading this nicely written poem. Guess I better be careful not to kill them damn spiders huh? haha! Take care.

    Lorna
    | Posted on 2005-12-07 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]
      I'm impressed by the flow of the prose. The whole poem lines up, the syllables actually meld into each other, and when it hits the third stanza in my head I can just see the walls started to distort, and the sounds starting to echo, the lights flickering all around me. Fantasy just turned nightmare- more beautiful than if you'd stayed happy the whole way through. Not even fairies are happy all the time. And this Prince... ah, how symbolic and possibly psychological. Can he just look at you and sour your mind? Should I call him the Devil or is he just a minion? Wherever it was you went that was forbidden, seems like he knew you were coming. Like he had the whole scene set up just for you from the start. Perhaps facing him in a new batch of prose may liberate your creativity- sounds like he's not too happy with your artistic appreciation.
    Good luck, great poem. Later
    | Posted on 2005-12-07 00:00:00 | by ghostknight | [ Reply to This ]
      Whimsical, yet I got confused to the end, did you run past the fairy sentries and into their home? I did like the poem particularly the last line "and there I saw the scarlet prince
    and I've been crazy ever since."
    the vivid description of the fairies as lightining bats(is that right?) was also interesting. Thanks for posting
    Argos
    | Posted on 2005-12-06 00:00:00 | by Aruemos | [ Reply to This ]
      I sense here an older writer, but I may be wrong for youth has also grinned from behind the verses.
    I never thought about just why people thought I was 'crazy', but now I know!
    I've killed more than spiders in my time, mostly rodents, but if thats all it took was an itsy bitsy spider, I'm sunk when it come to my sanity.
    This was fun and who know maybe it will be in the Medical Journals before long.
    | Posted on 2005-12-06 00:00:00 | by Clayton | [ Reply to This ]



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