Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: never sleeping treedots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: andnow
    ASL Info:    19.f.wa
    Elite Ratio:    3.57 - 136/135/42
    Words: 100
    Class/Type: Prose/
    Total Views: 942
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 593



    Description:
       We had to write this as a description of nature for my AP English class while studying Transcendentalism. I thought, why not post it here?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsnever sleeping treedots
    -------------------------------------------


    A tree stands alone in the silence of the blackness aroused by the early setting of the winter sun. Roots erupt in the midst of shadow-blanketed grass, where little green creeps through. An aged surrounding of bark marks the strength and wisdom that only a tree can embrace. As the wind breathes gently, a gathering of leaves dance around the branches. The faintly haunting echo of the owl’s calling sounds along the night. The fresh sent of crisp winter air collides with the lulling clouds hiding the illumination above. Amidst the center of a slumbering neighborhood, the tree stands awake.




    Submitted on 2005-12-08 01:25:44     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      The imagery is beautiful! I could see the tree and the night wonderfully. I especially enjoyed how you described the owl's calling.Thanx for taking the time to share. I wish I would have had a teacher in school that tried to stretch my abilities as yours did!
    | Posted on 2008-02-17 00:00:00 | by isis_lenore | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked the imagery, a lot, but some of the word choice was poor. lulling clouds, tree aroused, tree can embrace. these, and other choices like them, seemed awkward to a degree, and this took away from my enjoyment of the piece, likewise, form is an issue, as the poem (prose) is displayed in a simple chunk form, not even attempting to attract a reader with it's shape.

    Like the above paragraph for instance. ^

    Ya' dig?

    I just thought you might like a comment on this piece after all this time, so I decided I'd be the one to give it to you.

    WIth my luck, someone will come along and post before I do, and I'll feel like a regular ass.

    :)
    | Posted on 2006-10-05 00:00:00 | by Sheakhan | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    83717

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry