In the moonlight
The wind dares not to blow
In the tainted earth
The noise is ensnared
No one suffers the cold
The stone crumbles
the engravings fade
Soon what is
will be no more again.
| this piece is very good and i see a definate set up for your stanza's. each stanza has another part the goes with each line. the standing part and the elements of nature in the 1st stanza.|
the the earth and sounds in the second stanza.
the meaningless of names and words in the third. the tombstnes and the contridiction in the last stanza. i admit this is very clever and i like it so much i'm adding it to my fav.thx for the read.
|| Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by disturbedx1000 | [ Reply to This ] || This is a very good write...I loved the imagry and that eerie feeling you described...This was an intresting write..I"m adding it to my favs. This was a good read...thnx for sharing it! keep writing. this has inspired me to write one about the topic:)|
|| Posted on 2005-12-08 00:00:00 | by silent_death12 | [ Reply to This ] || I think you did a good job. I think that graveyards are creepy personally. But you wrote about it from a the memory of those buried will vanish soon. Very good imagery. I can like see rows of tombstones dissappearing.|
This was a fresh view on this topic. Nicely done.
|| Posted on 2005-12-08 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ] || This is really an interesting write|
I like how you expressed yourself
Though I dont agree with all you said This is still a very powerful write
Please if you get a chance take a look at some of my writes and let me know what you think
|| Posted on 2005-12-08 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ] || True. After the end it just kind of crumbles and fades. It is interesting and sad. It is realistic and appropriate though. I thought that you did well on it.|
|| Posted on 2005-12-08 00:00:00 | by Briannan | [ Reply to This ] || ooooo...very dark indeed. Graveyard sentiments...I think you hit it well. I liked the part about the names...they do get forgotten after time like you say.|
Very poignant thoughts and an interesting read.
|| Posted on 2005-12-08 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ] |