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A baby kiss before we die
Bite my wrist, make me cry
Water, blood, semen, wine
Take your life, I'll give you mine
Sugar kiss before you sleep
I’m drowning in the tears I weep
We'll go together, heaven or hell
If I am dead then I can't tell
I can't breathe
You're on your feet
Ready to leave
Where are you going?
Am I left all alone?
Must I face death
Here on my own?
A deadly kiss
I can't move
No more feelings
Nothing to prove
I saw you hold my bloodstained hand
Forever yours - I understand
I saw you kiss my lifeless shell
As you betrayed the trust I knew so well.
| This was a unique write, I thought the rhythm was a little off, but I suppose it wasn't meant to have any. The imagery was good, dark and blurry as a dream.||| Posted on 2006-01-09 00:00:00 | by Malcolm Bishop | [ Reply to This ] || wow this was a good write. correct me if im wrong but you are writing from the prospective of a lost soul. It seems that the best things said or the best things done ore only done after its too late. Nevertheless it was still a good write. Keep up the good work.||| Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by Demon__666 | [ Reply to This ] || Wow, this poem is so amazing. The use of rhyming is just amazing. The imagery the read gets is unexplainable. |
This is very powerful and truely orginal. And for you I hope things have patched up and hope things are going better for you.
|| Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by Autum-Moon | [ Reply to This ] || Wow wow wow all i can say is that this is a powerful piece well written and fantastic imagery i hope that this piece wasnt written from experience on your part and if so i hope you are feeling better i understand where you are coming from with this poem and applaud you for sharing it with us thank you very much |
Timmy S. Edgar
|| Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by Timmy S. Edgar | [ Reply to This ] |