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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Kisseddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Sugar
    ASL Info:    23/F/UK
    Elite Ratio:    3.43 - 84/63/9
    Words: 128
    Class/Type: Poetry/Dark
    Total Views: 943
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 822



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsKisseddots
    -------------------------------------------


    A baby kiss before we die
    Bite my wrist, make me cry
    Water, blood, semen, wine
    Take your life, I'll give you mine

    Sugar kiss before you sleep
    Iím drowning in the tears I weep
    We'll go together, heaven or hell
    If I am dead then I can't tell

    Broken kiss
    I can't breathe
    You're on your feet
    Ready to leave

    Where are you going?
    Am I left all alone?
    Must I face death
    Here on my own?

    A deadly kiss
    I can't move
    No more feelings
    Nothing to prove

    I saw you hold my bloodstained hand
    Forever yours - I understand
    I saw you kiss my lifeless shell
    As you betrayed the trust I knew so well.




    Submitted on 2005-12-09 05:14:44     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This was a unique write, I thought the rhythm was a little off, but I suppose it wasn't meant to have any. The imagery was good, dark and blurry as a dream.
    | Posted on 2006-01-09 00:00:00 | by Malcolm Bishop | [ Reply to This ]
      wow this was a good write. correct me if im wrong but you are writing from the prospective of a lost soul. It seems that the best things said or the best things done ore only done after its too late. Nevertheless it was still a good write. Keep up the good work.
    | Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by Demon__666 | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow, this poem is so amazing. The use of rhyming is just amazing. The imagery the read gets is unexplainable.

    This is very powerful and truely orginal. And for you I hope things have patched up and hope things are going better for you.
    | Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by Autum-Moon | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow wow wow all i can say is that this is a powerful piece well written and fantastic imagery i hope that this piece wasnt written from experience on your part and if so i hope you are feeling better i understand where you are coming from with this poem and applaud you for sharing it with us thank you very much

    Timmy S. Edgar
    | Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by Timmy S. Edgar | [ Reply to This ]


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