I lay in darkness
Destroyed by your latest revelation
I lay in silence
Wondering if I would survive.
I went over your confession
A thousand times or more
I searched for a reason
But all I could see was the end.
You cried, it made me feel guilty
I cried, it made me feel weak
You left, said you’d call me tomorrow
I waited, imagining where you’d gone.
I thought of a million angry questions
Jumped to all the wrong conclusions
Did you dream of her as you slept by my side?
Did you picture her face as we kissed?
Did you need her?
Did you want her?
Did you even stop once to consider us?
To consider me?
How can I be innocent, yet be the one who hurts the most?
The night passed sadly and slowly
I answered the phone
I heard your tears and your breath and your sorrys
I listened to your broken explanation.
You swore you loved me, only me
If you didn’t have me, you would die
You promised me over and over that it wouldn’t happen again
And I believe you.
I’m certain that you mean it this time.