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torn theory

Author: bloodied_angel
ASL Info:    15/Female/Oklahoma
Elite Ratio:    2.63 - 79 /119 /44
Words: 196
Class/Type: Poetry /Society
Total Views: 820
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1166


its just depressing

torn theory

million teens passing by
million faces wondering why
why that one kid walking
the wrong way on a one way street

her hood pulled up
her eyeliner's thick
her soul is broken
her flesh is split
she just wasnts to be forgotten
she wasts to be remeber the way she was
befor she was torn

they stare and wonder
they ask and comment
they try to help by taring her apart

she stares right back
she know the answer
but she wont tell answer
she ignores there comments
she pray to be left alone

her counciler says to her
"i know you hate me
i hate you too
i now relize you hurt your self
you do it for attention
you just want some one to care
stop feeling sorry for yourself"

she replied
"alright, you can put
Jane Doe on my grave
and below that write
she did it for your attention"

she walked out
and grabed a rope
she tied a knot
and let life go

Submitted on 2005-12-09 14:05:38     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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  Awesome write another fav from you. I'm stalking you...I know where you live. * laughs evilly * Pretty scary, huh? lol, anyway. I loved this poem. The rhyming was really cool.
| Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by Toxic_Rayne | [ Reply to This ]
  it sounds like somebodys having a bad day(joking). I like the concept behind this write. Though i can't say i'm found of mutilation, it does greatly bother me when those who think they understand say it's purely for attention. It's distressing when that is said, so i can oonly guess as to how it would make the inflictor feel. I'd revise it, just some spelling/grammatical errors and maybe an antonym here and there. It reminds me of one of my pieces. A quick thought, in order to be forgotten you must first have remembered, you can't forget what you never remember hope things get better.
| Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by dismentled | [ Reply to This ]

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