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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Specialdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Halston
    ASL Info:    20/female/carlsbad,ca
    Elite Ratio:    4.01 - 72/71/30
    Words: 67
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 1112
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 440



    Description:
       Written at 14



    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSpecialdots
    -------------------------------------------


    I noticed the world was you yesterday,
    And I realized it today
    You're just like passion,
    your eyes make me cry

    I wanna make you happy
    And I understand you care.
    You're just like red lipstick,
    your laugh makes me sigh.

    I wish I was special.
    And I know that I can't be.
    You're just a like a penny
    Your shine makes me shy.




    Submitted on 2005-12-09 17:59:54     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      wow Halston wow. I really liked this one, how it seems like everything is connected to him and him to everything. But, I would like it even better if it was a little longer. :)
    | Posted on 2006-01-30 00:00:00 | by Itzmeemiflee | [ Reply to This ]
      Special
    -


    I noticed the world was you yesterday,
    And I realized it today
    "yours" but i cant spell and have good grammer if it where to save my life. the intro cought my attention and told me i would have to pay attention.
    You're just like passion,
    your eyes make me cry
    this is the part you ropped my heart in.

    I wanna make you happy
    And I understand you care.
    You're just like red lipstick,
    your laugh makes me sigh.
    my favoirt part in this is the red lipstick. it was an unexpected add in and nicely done.
    I wish I was special.
    And I know that I can't be.
    this is sad and i hope you dont believe this.
    You're just a like a penny
    Your shine makes me shy
    this is simple cute.
    snuff



    | Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by snufthepunk28 | [ Reply to This ]
      to me this is short and i think you should of added more depth. Some lines I was unclear of and not sure of. i think you could of worked a lil harder on this but thats just me if you think this is good then ignore everything im saying its what you think that matters not me or anyone else.
    | Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by bluesoxz | [ Reply to This ]
      "I noticed the world was you yesterday" i thought that was a really good line.

    at first i wasn't understanding the connections, ie "you're just like redlipstick, your laugh makes me sigh" but then i stopped being a tard & realized that you see him in everything, or rather, you see everything in him.

    its also possible that i'm completely wrong.
    | Posted on 2005-12-09 00:00:00 | by lovefatal | [ Reply to This ]


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