Lost In Eternity by BleedingTears

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Submission Name: Lost In Eternity dots

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Author:	BleedingTears
ASL Info:	16/f/Neverland
Elite Ratio:	4.06 - 418/289/62
Words:	111

Class/Type:	Poetry/The pain inside
Total Views:	304
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	690

Description:
I usually dont like to rhyme but i just did with this one because i was just really upset and was just writing stuff down because i didnt know what else to do.

Lost In Eternity dots

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No violence to show the anger inside
No tears to show the sorrow I hide.
Nothing from our knowledge can express what I really want to say
Everything passes by me, every moment, every day.
Sitting here waiting to see that open door.
But my life is nothing like before.
Where in the hell am I suppose to be?
I'm lost far and deep in eternity.
Running away into the shadows.
But I see no path to follow.
Ringing at my ears
Chasing of my fears
Staring into your shining eyes
Bringing back memories of the nights I cried.
But this is the place we're all lost in.
Lost in Eternity.

Submitted on 2005-12-12 16:55:20 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  You showed your raw, pure emotions in this work. And it paid off! Like the others, I see nothing wrong with this piece. I love the emotions portrade in the begining.

"No violence to show the anger inside
No tears to show the sorrow I hide."

Was my favorite part!

"Running away into the shadows.
But I see no path to follow."

Was really good too!
You need to keep up writeing.

Keep up the good work!!
~David~
| Posted on 2006-11-15 00:00:00 | by D.C.M. | [ Reply to This ]
  i love this piece. its so full of emotion and thats what i like to see when im reading every now and then. this poem is so good and i have nothing bad to say about it...in my opinion, there is nothing you need to fix in this piece.
| Posted on 2006-01-06 00:00:00 | by kession | [ Reply to This ]
  This is very good, i dont think it stands out very far from other great poems, but it does show very clearly your emotions and your perspective. Great write.

~Kane~
| Posted on 2005-12-22 00:00:00 | by Kane Martyr | [ Reply to This ]
  WOW! This was great! I think it's perfect. Your feelings come through perfectly. The rhyming was good to, it made it flow. I have nothing else to say. Good job!

PinkFairy
| Posted on 2005-12-12 00:00:00 | by PinkFairy | [ Reply to This ]
  THIS IS SO AWESOME! Definately a fav of mine. Your feelings, like PinkFairy said, were showed so clearly and it was like you were painting me a story. Great job!
| Posted on 2005-12-12 00:00:00 | by Toxic_Rayne | [ Reply to This ]

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