[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Losing Myself To MY Own Hate.dots

    Author: shotxgunxsinner
    ASL Info:    17/female/New York
    Elite Ratio:    2.51 - 23/31/11
    Words: 162
    Class/Type: Rant/Death
    Total Views: 936
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 838

       very depressed at this point in time.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsLosing Myself To MY Own Hate.dots

    The black walls cave in as the night gets colder. Lost in my own insanities. Looking at every insecurity and picking up a knife. The blood drains from my body as I turned white as a ghost walking the hall at night in an abandon house. Itís a mystery on how someone could ever feel this way. All the love is love from a knife and blood from the tender wrists. The veins turn black and I fall to the floor, gasping for air wondering if someone will notice, wondering if I will survive tonight. No, probably not. Iím seen as the mistake you made when you had an abortion. I am the disappointment that left you choking at your grave. I am the misfit that the punks always talk about. And most of all, I am like nothing, and nothing again. Nothing just like the wind and the air. Invisible like you are to me. I feel nothing and nothing againÖ

    Submitted on 2005-12-15 07:58:22     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      a very dark, vivid write. it's as if the reader is right there... i especially like the end here, 'nothing' almost welcomed...

    well done!
    | Posted on 2006-01-25 00:00:00 | by adw | [ Reply to This ]
      some of the lines got at me... while some lost me. Im not gonna lie your ending wuz nice... swell way ta end that. Your opener wuz very dark and dismal, great way to start it off. But why call it a rant? Its personal, so its non of my business, in anycase i like it

    4 out of 5
    | Posted on 2005-12-15 00:00:00 | by uncommon_flu | [ Reply to This ]
      Hey hey, lol your right next to me in class lol,
    Anyway i just read your 1st piece and it's a lot like some of mine just in a different view, i liked the over all theme of this piece and can really relate, great write and just to warn you some people might comment on the organization of the poem idk but they really don't like having poems in paragraphs. Later,

    | Posted on 2005-12-15 00:00:00 | by disturbedx1000 | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]