Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: "I"dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Martin S. Allen
    ASL Info:    33 male
    Elite Ratio:    3.98 - 671/237/43
    Words: 102
    Class/Type: Poetry/Society
    Total Views: 1402
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 651



    Description:
       This poem actually has a meaning, but you have to put some thought into it.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots"I"dots
    -------------------------------------------


    I am black
    I am white
    I am day
    I am night
    Open cuts, and mended wounds
    Afterlife, and empty tombs

    I live in your city
    I dwell in your rooms
    I open your mind
    You breath in my fumes

    I teach your children
    I lead the blind
    I preach in your churches
    Your life is all mine

    I am strong
    I am weak
    I am mighty
    I am meek
    Behind closed doors
    Under the sheets
    In front of a crowd
    Out in the streets

    I am life
    I am death
    I am birth
    Your final breath




    Submitted on 2005-12-16 12:28:53     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      The first thing I thought was yeah this is about God, but after I read it again it has a different tone to me. I really like this..
    This makes me ponder.thanks for sharing

    Jen
    | Posted on 2012-08-29 00:00:00 | by jeniecel | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem rocked. i hope i am not mitakened but i thought of The Lord... if it is wrong hen please inform me...
    "I live in your city
    I dwell in your rooms
    I open your mind
    You breath in my fumes"
    wow, i love all of the things you cane up with.
    the topics are so vast...

    "I am life
    I am death
    I am birth
    Your final breath"

    i love it when poetry ends with meaningfull things like death.

    Great write

    Everything has its end

    Fana

    | Posted on 2008-09-23 00:00:00 | by BusterLILblock | [ Reply to This ]
      This is about God, the only thought that came to mind when I read it. Once again great work and thank you for writing it and sharing it with us.

    ~~Donna~~
    | Posted on 2007-11-20 00:00:00 | by PrettyHeart | [ Reply to This ]
      i like the contradictions like black/white day/night...it keeps the subject of the poem vague and creats some quick changes of tone that make this a fun read. gj
    | Posted on 2007-09-11 00:00:00 | by poyu | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting.. I like the rhyme scheme. I personally think it would go better as lyrics instead of poetry, but whatever you want to make it is fine.
    | Posted on 2006-11-19 00:00:00 | by Two Meters Away | [ Reply to This ]
      Alright so my mind just about exploded lol. But the only thing I could think to say it was is God so If Im wrong tell me .

    much LOVE
    James
    | Posted on 2006-07-15 00:00:00 | by James Reyna | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a very complicated poem. But when i got to the middle I thought i was beginnging to comprehend it. Let me take a stab at it lol. Are you talking about God and all that he can do? I think you were able to capture the reader in this one. You had a great flow to it. And it stuck through the whole poem. I loved it and it is def a favorite.

    Mikki
    | Posted on 2005-12-30 00:00:00 | by MiKkI25 | [ Reply to This ]
      I like this. It seems to have a very strong point, yet no point at all. The rhyming was great, and though it was unclear I think that was a goal.
    The Conqueror
    | Posted on 2005-12-26 00:00:00 | by The Conqueror | [ Reply to This ]
      wow it sounds like ur God! haha maybe you should not start out with i am black i am white. it sounds recest or something, but i do like it alot! and yes i do like the move road trip as well! oxoxoxoxox
    Jackie
    | Posted on 2005-12-16 00:00:00 | by superjew2327 | [ Reply to This ]
      This flowed so well - like a river of wisdom. I like that you illustrate that "IT" is everything - Good, bad, indifferent.
    It was simply eloquent - if that makes sense. Sometimes we forget how simple "IT" really is.
    Love,Peace,Joy~Feel,Experience,BE@@@
    tif
    | Posted on 2005-12-16 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      This is an exceptional wonderful write
    You really captured my mind with this one
    Brilliant!
    This was one of the most thought provoking poems I have ever read
    I will definately be looking foe more of your writes


    This is a Favorite

    God Bless
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-12-16 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      Your style is unique in this poem you sound almost like a rapper. I hope that is not offensive. I like the lines "i teach your children, i lead the blind, i preach in your chruches, your life is all mine." It really catches your attention and grips you. this is a no nonsense poem that covers all aspects of life. Very good
    | Posted on 2005-12-16 00:00:00 | by Fraser | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    84683

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Watch them Die written by HisNameIsNoMore
    On Loop written by Daniel Barlow
    It's been a while written by Sharati_hottie
    Unfortunate Reality written by TeslaKoyal
    In the end written by Janesaddiction
    Munyonyo written by expiring_touch
    Cage written by distortedcloud
    Bam written by Daniel Barlow
    Dirge of Nostalgia written by HisNameIsNoMore
    To the King written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Date night written by expiring_touch
    Lunch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    On Top of a Water Wheel written by Wolfwatching
    Wasps written by Wolfwatching
    You Make Me speechless written by elephantasia
    Genesis written by saartha
    Can't let my demons go written by faideddarkness
    This written by Chelebel
    Summer Nights written by ollie_wicked
    In My Head written by faideddarkness
    All Time Low written by Janesaddiction
    By the bar written by expiring_touch
    Love Can Be... written by HAVENSMITH92
    The Search written by HisNameIsNoMore
    The Last to Walk the Earth written by HisNameIsNoMore
    I'm here written by BloodtornAngel
    Incubus written by monad
    Limbo written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Chasing The Lie written by jackz
    Hopelessly Blind written by ForgottenGraves

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry