Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: "Radio Friendly"dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Martin S. Allen
    ASL Info:    33 male
    Elite Ratio:    3.98 - 671/237/43
    Words: 71
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 1079
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 511



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dots"Radio Friendly"dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Sing a song then quickly die
    No more tears, no more goodbyes
    Mainstream junkies, disciples of fashion
    Write em’, sing em’, cash em’
    Hit parade, singles charts
    Is this style? Or is this art?
    Radio wave serenade
    The youth lie unfulfilled
    With bloodstained razorblades
    Young lives left to rebuild
    Rehab! Sacrificial slab
    Juvy hall! Downward fall
    Heroes or villains take your pick
    Turn the radio on then turn a trick




    Submitted on 2005-12-16 15:30:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I liked this. I would comment more, but then I would feel ridiculous criticizing my superiors
    | Posted on 2011-03-31 00:00:00 | by chiatealover | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the way you made the issue of such a thing as one hit wonder bands actually mean something and not just complain. I can't really give you a complaint you are a far more superior writer that myself. Keep up the awsome work.

    James
    | Posted on 2006-07-08 00:00:00 | by James Reyna | [ Reply to This ]
      Ooo, this is good, really good. I know this is going to sound like a super cliché comment, but I must commend your flow. It was awesome! I love reading pieces that carry you through like riding a wave, and then slamming you into a rocky cliff. You certainly pulled that off here. The message of the poem is absolutely wonderful, and I couldn't agree more. The wanna-be rappers and emo cutters--music is killing. Anyway, yeah this is good stuff.

    Justin :)

    PS - I think this line:

    Is this style? Or is this art?

    Would be stronger if you switched it around, like this:

    Is this art? Or is this style?
    | Posted on 2006-07-12 00:00:00 | by IamYourTragedy | [ Reply to This ]
      for some reason this poem reminded me of dee dee ramone. junkies, fashion, turning tricks. all themes of dee dee's writing. i loved this poem. straight to the point. no bull[censored] adjectives to cushion it. write more like this. i love it.
    | Posted on 2006-03-01 00:00:00 | by DBC | [ Reply to This ]
      i love the poem, and i beleive that music is lyrical not literal - yet too many people take literal meanings and run with them... this is a great write about the youth culture and the problems with the youth culture today...

    all i have to say is please seperate idiotic kids from the artist themselfs... artists, like poets, write about what they know and if all they know is the street then thier music will reflect that... but what people take from the music is sometimes different than what the artist's intention was... rap artists may rap about murders, because they know that world, but most do not condone violence - so if a fan takes a literal meaning and does someone harm, that is not the artists fault... if you do not blame the novelist for writing about murder, how can you blame the rap singer for the same thing...

    thanks for letting me rant... i did enjoy your poem immensly...

    PEACE and LOVE, greg
    | Posted on 2006-01-10 00:00:00 | by geherald | [ Reply to This ]
      I think it is so unbelievably strange how you can pick any topic or subject and write about it. I have to just start writing...if I try to direct it in any specific direction it changes the message.
    I'm really happy to see someone reaching out to the teens who find pain an answer to their problems.
    The Conqueror
    | Posted on 2005-12-26 00:00:00 | by The Conqueror | [ Reply to This ]
      This write is very deep
    I believe you are reaching out to the airwaves and the musical artists asking them to sing and write with more positive thoughts
    I hope and Pray they will soon realize just how powerful
    Music really is to a wounded soul
    God Bless
    Your Friend
    Ron
    | Posted on 2005-12-21 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      I like the message here, I think it rings true in a lot of ways. Though I very much believe "parents" hold the greater responsibilty in how their kids turn out.. I do think the music industry could, and should, have a certain responsibilty in what they put out for teens to listen to.

    The length is just right. You were able to say so much in just a few words. The rhyming is good too. It doesn't rhyme in an exact fashion, but good enough to read easily and have good flow. You have some good lines in this. Keep up the good work. No critique from me.

    ~Sandra
    | Posted on 2005-12-19 00:00:00 | by Intricate1 | [ Reply to This ]
      MUWAHAHAHAHAHAAHA...that's all I'm gonna spit ~ cause <@> Know Understand "IT"...live in the truth and X in the pit - sometimes some gristle a little bit grit...Love,Peace,Joy~Feel,Experience,BE~~~
    tif
    | Posted on 2005-12-16 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      The music buisness is in a sad state of affairs there is no doubt, for every band worth listening to there are ten that really aren't. More so with these reality shows x factor etc etc. You caught the mood in this and it all read easily and neatly from line to line.

    Rehab! Sacrificial slab
    Juvy hall! Downward fall

    These lines rang a little hollow, almost like you couldn't think of much else, but maybe that fits with the subject at hand.
    Liked it though, simple and to the point.

    TTFN
    V
    | Posted on 2005-12-16 00:00:00 | by Vastmark | [ Reply to This ]
      Wow this was really good...this is impressive from you in that most of the writes I've read from you are longer...I really enjoyed your meaning here...you always have a good message to portray. I loved your last two lines...they really tied the whole value together.anyway this was really well written. hope to read more of yours sometime.
    peac.e
    ~silent
    | Posted on 2005-12-16 00:00:00 | by silent_death12 | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    84710

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    To the Devil and Candle written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (3) written by endlessgame23
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Carry written by saartha
    Records I written by Raphael
    You read free written by poetotoe
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Journey written by endlessgame23
    Love written by saartha
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    a mood to be free written by Daniel Barlow
    Comme un lion en avril written by Outlaw
    Silent Screams In Silent Dreams written by poetotoe
    i've missed written by mysalvation
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (5) written by endlessgame23
    Every..... written by jackz
    Cover written by saartha
    Yes written by poetotoe
    I AM THANKFUL FOR written by Ramneet
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    mimicry written by expiring_touch
    an unashamed poverty written by Daniel Barlow
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Deep Into A World Of Despair written by DeathTone
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Shut Up written by annie0888
    I, Plutarch written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Formal Jen written by Daniel Barlow
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry