Sign up to EliteSkills




Already have an account? Login to Roleplay.Cloud
Forgot password? Recover Password

The only one


Author: Jingles
ASL Info:    19.m.canada
Elite Ratio:    2.08 - 18 /60 /36
Words: 296
Class/Type: Poetry /The pain inside
Total Views: 1286
Average Vote:    No vote yet.
Bytes: 1921



Description:


Don't bother telling me its to long because I know it is. But do tell me anything else i should change...most of you might not understand it...its complicated But I hope you like it.


The only one



Withering away in pools of slumbered crimson,
I try to drown my sorrow but this sorrow swims well.
Was there love once or have I forgotten her?
A lust for complete nothingess that lusts for more nothing.

It came with smiles,it came with gestures, it came with motive.
Shattered heart in one hand,satin blade in the other.
This is between me,this blade,and the shards of my past,

Standing alone,upright and motionless,im drowning in her sea.
The rising and sinking of every consciousness I've ever known.
My sea is dying, but death is a doorway,all I need is the key.
At the very root of me I know this,so I begin with the end in mind.
Long live the falling love,it's so pointless to fall,don't believe everything you see.
Deeciet decieves even the most keen of sense.

Your names an indication in red blood,and I'm choking on my fears.
I speak careful formulations of defense,words without echo.
my silence will fall victim to my eternal reflection.
Every moment with the intimidating sound of those three words lost forever.
Lost forever in the sea,the great sea in which frozen suffer swims.
Truth is the method of defense,passion cries out.
Through frosted lungs whispered screams fade.
Sewing the insecure thread of reason,reality comes undone.
Im haunted by the strains of human limitation,by the weakness of emotion.

Covered in dust and ashes,the aftermath of my eulogy,nothing breeds nothing.
In this part of the story I am the one who dies alone.
These emptry bullets,the narrator,the key to my doorway,
No more endless disappointment,no more burden to inflict pain.
This velvet casket lies open for me,im the one cascading into oblivion.
.The only one.




Submitted on 2005-12-18 20:09:40     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Edit post

Rate This Submission

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!




Comments


  I loved it. Seriously you are a great writer! where do you get your inspration?? just reading your work makes me feel everything ! keep it up its seriously great
Star
| Posted on 2005-12-19 00:00:00 | by Star | [ Reply to This ]


Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

1. Be honest.
2. Try not to give only compliments.
3. How did it make you feel?
4. Why did it make you feel that way?
5. Which parts?
6. What distracted from the piece?
7. What was unclear?
8. What does it remind you of?
9. How could it be improved?
10. What would you have done differently?
11. What was your interpretation of it?
12. Does it feel original?



84932