Description: should introduce this poem a little so your not to confused. im going to write a series of letters between two brothers over a period of years. im not sure where its going, but i thought it would be a fun challenging project, and at the same time would help me sharpen my pen. if you have any ideas of feedback thats greatly appriciated and dont be shy about it. so i hope you enjoy and tell me what you think. oh and if you can think of good names im not accepting applications.
September 22, 1991 -------------------------------------------
dear brother i miss you
and weve only been apart a while
lifes been good at home
moms still full of laughs and smiles
its funny i finally have
all the space i always wanted
but i wont take over your rooms
ill leave it alone just like i promised
though the parents may take
and turn it into an office
but ill do what i can
when they start to stop it
how is the college
have you been lost or lonely?
are there losts of hot chicks
that look lost and horny?
speaking of hot chicks
the girl friend is great
we go out all the time
on date after date
lately though im nevrvous
shes getting quite serious
talkin all about our future
but im like "im not tryin to be hearin this"
i mean i know that i love her
i guess i need some advice
your a pro man
you know all about love life
lets see real quick
what else have i forgotten
oh did i tell you
your totally awesome?
the cars running fine
and work as been fun
schools going smoothly
and this i gotta run
jenny just got here
and demands my attention
but there is one more thing
that i need to mention
i do miss you brother
so write me back soon
and ill keep up my promise
of protecting your room
I like the idea of writing a series of letters. I've often thought of doing something similar myself. If i were you i would go ahead and work this up into complete sentences with all the proper punctuation and all. You might even write it in paragraph form to see how it looks. That would be in keeping with the 'letter' style.
For examples of the epistolary style you might have a look at "The Sorrows of Young Wurther" by Goethe...and "Le Liaisons Dangerous" by de Laclos. Those novels are among the finest examples of the epistolary style...at least in my experience, and i am admittedly not a very well read person. But we do learn from what we read, and checking those out might give you some perspective.
When we write letters we tend to say things that we wouldn't normally say. Its like we have the liberty and the impetus to be honest. So go ahead and get personal in these if you choose to write more. This also gives the reader the sense that they are peeking in on something very private, and so it heightens their interest.
I especially like how you said "love," at the end of it. Not something we always say to people, but it does come out in letters. Especially letters from jail...and what not.
Submission Name: September 22, 1991
