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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: September 22, 1991dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: jbb360
    ASL Info:    22.m.wa
    Elite Ratio:    3.63 - 25/36/12
    Words: 236
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 634
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1473



    Description:
       should introduce this poem a little so your not to confused. im going to write a series of letters between two brothers over a period of years. im not sure where its going, but i thought it would be a fun challenging project, and at the same time would help me sharpen my pen. if you have any ideas of feedback thats greatly appriciated and dont be shy about it. so i hope you enjoy and tell me what you think. oh and if you can think of good names im not accepting applications.


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    dotsSeptember 22, 1991dots
    -------------------------------------------


    dear brother i miss you
    and weve only been apart a while
    lifes been good at home
    moms still full of laughs and smiles
    its funny i finally have
    all the space i always wanted
    but i wont take over your rooms
    ill leave it alone just like i promised
    though the parents may take
    and turn it into an office
    but ill do what i can
    when they start to stop it
    how is the college
    have you been lost or lonely?
    are there losts of hot chicks
    that look lost and horny?
    speaking of hot chicks
    the girl friend is great
    we go out all the time
    on date after date
    lately though im nevrvous
    shes getting quite serious
    talkin all about our future
    but im like "im not tryin to be hearin this"
    i mean i know that i love her
    i guess i need some advice
    your a pro man
    you know all about love life
    lets see real quick
    what else have i forgotten
    oh did i tell you
    your totally awesome?
    the cars running fine
    and work as been fun
    schools going smoothly
    and this i gotta run
    jenny just got here
    and demands my attention
    but there is one more thing
    that i need to mention
    i do miss you brother
    so write me back soon
    and ill keep up my promise
    of protecting your room

    love ______




    Submitted on 2005-12-22 01:40:57     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like the idea of writing a series of letters. I've often thought of doing something similar myself. If i were you i would go ahead and work this up into complete sentences with all the proper punctuation and all. You might even write it in paragraph form to see how it looks. That would be in keeping with the 'letter' style.

    For examples of the epistolary style you might have a look at "The Sorrows of Young Wurther" by Goethe...and "Le Liaisons Dangerous" by de Laclos. Those novels are among the finest examples of the epistolary style...at least in my experience, and i am admittedly not a very well read person. But we do learn from what we read, and checking those out might give you some perspective.

    When we write letters we tend to say things that we wouldn't normally say. Its like we have the liberty and the impetus to be honest. So go ahead and get personal in these if you choose to write more. This also gives the reader the sense that they are peeking in on something very private, and so it heightens their interest.

    I especially like how you said "love," at the end of it. Not something we always say to people, but it does come out in letters. Especially letters from jail...and what not.

    see you around,
    twack
    | Posted on 2005-12-22 00:00:00 | by twacky | [ Reply to This ]


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