Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Holding ondots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: prittee1
    ASL Info:    16/f/aus
    Elite Ratio:    2.51 - 13/21/6
    Words: 190
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 680
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1122



    Description:
       this poem is kind of... lyric-y... but thats just the way i wrote it. i wrote it 2 years ago, when i was 12, so its not very good, but i thought it was worth posting, anyway. it seems kind of childish to me... what do you think?


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsHolding ondots
    -------------------------------------------


    I keep holding on,
    And I canít let go,
    I try to forget,
    But my feelings show.
    I keep holding on,
    And I canít let go,
    I am so confused,
    And I just donít know.

    I see you at school,
    In the classroom,
    I try to walk by, try to keep my cool.
    But my hearts beating fast,
    And my feet are like led,
    There is something about you that stays in my head.

    With a wave and a smile,
    You dismiss me,
    Youíve moved on but I canít break free.
    Just the look in your eye,
    And the spring in your step,
    Is enough to inform me that you donít care.

    Thereís a girl in our class,
    And you smile everyday,
    You used to look at me that way.
    With that cheeky grin,
    And those sparkling eyes,
    You used to be my special guy.

    I keep holding on,
    And I canít let go,
    I try to forget,
    But my feelings grow.
    I keep holding on,
    And I canít let go,
    I am so confused,
    And I just donít know.




    Submitted on 2005-12-24 01:51:17     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      i like this! i can totally relate to it its not even funny! liking someone is like one of those steps that i wish i never took! but thats life u get hurt but u gotta get bak up! good job!
    ~akaila evonne~
    | Posted on 2005-12-24 00:00:00 | by iluvpoetry_1 | [ Reply to This ]
      I liked this poem.I can relate to it and I'm sure alot of others can as well.At some point in time though the writing seems a little forced.But all in all a good write.

    ->Candace<-
    | Posted on 2005-12-24 00:00:00 | by ArtichokeMosher | [ Reply to This ]
      this is great... and i can so relate to it... i feel the same way bout someone... and i'm totallt confused. neway i love the poem... its great
    | Posted on 2005-12-24 00:00:00 | by submarine | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    85495

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry