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    dots Submission Name: a new year beginsdots

    Author: ertha
    Elite Ratio:    4.35 - 124/135/24
    Words: 89
    Class/Type: Poetry/
    Total Views: 1063
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 540

       curmudgeonly greetings
    just a passing phase I hope

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsa new year beginsdots

    no more Christmas crackers
    or lights on the tree
    no need to be cheerful
    no more 'bonne homie'

    throw out the empty bottles
    the whiskey and the wine
    pack up the pretences
    that everything is fine

    be sure to turn your back
    on unfulfilled old dreams
    feelings you must bury
    beneath your stifled screams

    no more stony smiles
    no more inane grins
    now Christmastide is over
    brave New Year begins

    Submitted on 2006-01-02 07:00:50     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Dear Little Child;
    I'm writing to you from my home far away,
    I came to your house just the other day!
    You must clean up the mess, sorry for that,
    My spirit must stay for that's where its at!
    | Posted on 2006-01-05 00:00:00 | by Clayton | [ Reply to This ]
      Nice tweaks. I think you have done a good job on this one. I like it!

    Happy New Year!

    Oh... this is cynical, but so true.

    Christmas crackers - I like the alliteration

    tree - need - cheerful - very nice

    whiskey - wine, it has been done before but I still like it here

    pack - pretence

    The last two verses seem to lose a little of the spark of the first two. However, that is also a nice metaphor for the theme of the poem.

    Good job!

    | Posted on 2006-01-03 00:00:00 | by beatthedrum | [ Reply to This ]
      Sounds like a 'call to face the real world' piece; one involving people who haven't resolved last year's dilemmas, but bravely forge ahead hopeful '06 will be a little more forgiving than'05 (and totally unconvinced of that fond wish). Amazing how life can give you a hangover more intense than any that flows out of a bottle, that must be the reason people choose the bottle (or any other addictive behavior) so often. I'm surprised no one has commented on this before; it says exactly what it should. Take care. Bill.
    | Posted on 2006-01-02 00:00:00 | by rws | [ Reply to This ]

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