Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: So Prettydots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cuddledumplin
    ASL Info:    36/ f/UK
    Elite Ratio:    4.08 - 6269/5927/526
    Words: 96
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 978
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 565



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsSo Prettydots
    -------------------------------------------


    He only paints in the colours of bruises
    because all that's real to him is pain,
    so the sky is the purplish blue you get from a swift blow.
    Night is the grey black of a blackened eye;
    earth is the yellow brown of fading contusions,
    and the irises he paints for his lover
    are the peculiar purple you get with blood beneath the skin
    for inside of him rests a soul beaten black and blue,
    and his artwork constitutes a cry for help
    that no one can see because it's just so pretty.





    Submitted on 2004-04-27 07:54:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow. Again I am stunned by the naked honesty in your words. Very different from just painting a picture, or talking about a sunset. This cuts, but the wounds heal nicely.
    | Posted on 2004-05-04 00:00:00 | by Casper | [ Reply to This ]
      i liek this, i liek the way it seems as like who cares if hes beat up inside its jsut really pretty, or thats the tone i recieve from it, but anywho great write!
    | Posted on 2004-04-27 00:00:00 | by gigglygirl | [ Reply to This ]
      Outstanding!
    | Posted on 2004-04-27 00:00:00 | by Emerging Soul | [ Reply to This ]
      Is it not amazing when you know those commenting by the words they create, how the comments follow the style each favors?
    So I'll just say this; You painted well.
    As always!
    | Posted on 2004-04-27 00:00:00 | by Clayton | [ Reply to This ]
      this was an exceptional piece of work. the beauty of the colors juxtaposed with the abuse was very original and vivid. and the last two lines are brilliant. actually, the whole piece is! wonderful work, dumplin!!
    | Posted on 2004-04-27 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      There is a kind of universal truth when I hear about things of real beauty emerging from pain. I think this write was remarkably exceptional - the way it has captured the essence of that truth. It's left me a little stunned.
    | Posted on 2004-04-28 00:00:00 | by Judy | [ Reply to This ]
      wow... this is so confusing... i mean the colours are SO gorgeous but when you realise the violence they come from its like how can smething so painful and hurtful sound so beautiful... i really like this!
    | Posted on 2004-05-01 00:00:00 | by Someones Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree with the idea you presented here of a man so full of pain, and so bruised by life that he can only paint in the color of bruises.

    My opinion is that lines 3-4-5 could be omitted completely and still the thought would be translated clearly to the reader. They would see the colors in their own perspective and don't really need the point to be driven home so hard.

    He only paints in the colors of bruises
    Because all that's real to him is pain
    And the irises he paints for his lover
    Are the peculiar purple you get with blood beneath the skin
    For inside of him rests a soul beaten black and blue
    And his artwork constitutes a cry for help
    That no one can see because it's just so pretty

    These words are beautiful and complete the image in my mind quite realisticly. Very well said.
    | Posted on 2004-04-28 00:00:00 | by angela~ | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem is breathing out pain (and it's pretty.) Every word here is carefully thought out. Beauty often does come from pain, but this is heartbreaking - that no one gets it. I am totally talking in circles. I love it.

    ~ Niphredil
    | Posted on 2004-05-02 00:00:00 | by Niphredil | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    8620

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Not the Devil, but the Wind written by endlessgame23
    Delicious Stews written by elephantasia
    // Seasonal Song written by ShadowParadox
    Gaia written by endlessgame23
    Relentless. The Visceral Fracture. written by Daniel Barlow
    Things They (Don't) Say written by TheStillSilence
    Meaningless Meanings written by ForgottenGraves
    going,,,"Skin." written by teika5
    The Want written by Daniel Barlow
    Beauty Rest written by jackz
    Sword in the Water written by Wolfwatching
    Honeymoon written by TheStillSilence
    Hyle written by endlessgame23
    Adoration written by TheStillSilence
    untitled written by Outlaw
    The Human Harmonic written by Daniel Barlow
    A Thousand Reflections written by endlessgame23
    Across the bed written by expiring_touch
    Compartments written by TheStillSilence
    Live In Between written by teika5
    Starseed written by endlessgame23
    Johnny's Cock written by endlessgame23
    A Worsening Effect written by Daniel Barlow
    In a Corner written by jeniecel
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth written by endlessgame23
    The World written by jjd
    A bit of Pain written by teika5
    Verse: written by Daniel Barlow
    (Untitled Song) written by TeslaKoyal
    FamiliarDemons ©™ written by kyserin

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry