When my father told me he was a drag,
Carrying his dresses in a pink sparkly bag,
I couldn't believe the things I had seen,
For my dads not a dad, he's a bloody drag queen.
We went to a gig, the first of his time,
With a hall full of puffs all stood in a line,
They whistled and cheered and yelled 'hoorah',
My dad took it in, and nudged up his bra...
He started to boogie as if in a trance,
Swaying and thrusting in a sick sort of dance,
But the jerking and shaking gave an unseen dilemma,
His bra strap had broken from an almighty tremor...
And now from his top, one hung round the side,
As if it was shy and trying to hide,
And one lucky lad has noticed the breast,
And shouted out above the rest...
"Hey gorgeous, one of your boobs has fallen outta place"
"It's none of your business where my breasts lie boy" said dad going red in the face.
My dad in a panic, lifted his dress,
To cover the boob that caused such distress,
And in return, he showed a bit more
Than what any of the gays had bargained for...
He turned in a rush, to escape the mad crowd,
Who were over the moon and screamed really loud,
As he rushed, he tripped on the rim of the door,
Which caused his left breast to fall out on the floor...
His agent came out all flustered in face,
Screaming and calling my dad a disgrace,
"You're fired" he said "You're finished, you're done"
"And take off those tights - I lent them from mum..."
At the end of the night, when the shows had all finished,
The panic and trauma of the gig had diminished,
I sat next to my dad and said "look you're no fool"
"You've gone from hot daddy back to my daddy cool