Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: should i sleep...dots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: cannibal
    ASL Info:    18/f/MO usa
    Elite Ratio:    3.88 - 47/47/15
    Words: 261
    Class/Type: Random Thoughts/Serious
    Total Views: 744
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1508



    Description:
       well i feel like shite and this is what came out of me because of it. I know "not another suicide poem" yeah well i feel horrible at the moment. Like i just want to get the blade and run it across my arms because i know that it used to make me feel better. And when i get sad like this i can smell the blood and taste it in my mouth and it makes me hunger for the cuts that used to form on my arms. Eh i am so dramatic..whatever read it and tell me what you think...thanks.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsshould i sleep...dots
    -------------------------------------------


    Should I sleep
    Why sleep when you know that you will only wake
    Wake to another day of disappointment
    I am itchy in this skin
    There are no scares but I can see them,
    I can see the marks of past mutilation.
    I yearn for death again.

    This soul is sinking deeper in
    This skin is growing hard
    A shell that can not be cracked
    I want to scratch at it
    I want to satisfy the demon inside
    (I can smell the blood and it smells so sweet)
    She calls
    Singing like a siren
    But I will try to hold my ears
    She can not get me here

    And sleep is not satisfying
    Sleep only brings more illusion to my reality
    More want to my ever growing yearns
    If I hold my breath will it stop
    Sink deep into the water and watch the blood red bubbles as I fall deeper into the void
    Will I slip away or will only a carcass remain
    No soul inside
    Body is all

    So what is my complication
    I am to deep in it
    Sinking in its sand
    No hand to grab me
    (stop your struggling and let it swallow you whole)
    Whispers from inside making there way to the surface
    Springing there letters on my tongue
    Bouncing in my mouth

    Eyes must be blood red by now
    Staring past the shallow nick nacks
    (Burn them all)
    A fleshy confession
    An only human mistake





    Submitted on 2006-01-03 02:32:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      A subject not touched very often.Shocking and hardcore in every sense of the word,however and this is not to depress you even more,or cause more sleepless nights but i feel that i need to say this...USE MORE VISUALS...sleep deprivation is a sickness and if this is written realy well and studied outside of your zone you will be able to give the world a poem that speaks more than just flowers and a box of tissues. I like it, you can do better though,i believe everyone can!L
    | Posted on 2006-01-03 00:00:00 | by Louis Dcree | [ Reply to This ]
      yes. you should sleep. dreading tomorrow only makes the urge to die worse. it makes it all the more powerful. you know. not like I've never felt the same way... I think we all do, at some point in time, but... that's aside the point.
    n_n;; I hope you don't mind if I leave out the critique and the "I REALLY LIKED THIS"--run of the mill commentry style--
    but that's just what I have to say. for some reason I feel null to the entire WORLD PROCESS and it's sucha refreshing feeling...

    sowwy for rambling ;-;
    -love Mi
    | Posted on 2006-01-03 00:00:00 | by Mieko | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    86283

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry