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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: The Cocoa was Betterdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: beatthedrum
    ASL Info:    55- F - Southern CA USA
    Elite Ratio:    4.18 - 881/810/122
    Words: 98
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 706
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 620



    Description:
       
    I had actually composed a small moody piece of music that sort of captured the feeling of the day. This poem was then specifically done to be read over that.
    It is about the feelings and a few hidden metaphors or symbols for the images.
    Clouds = Melancholy.
    Flames (candle and fireplace) = Love. (She doesn't have to have a roaring flame just now, the light of the candle is enough.)
    The cocoa is hot steamy passion.

    It is just the way my mind works.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Cocoa was Betterdots
    -------------------------------------------


    Even in midday she enjoys a candle's glow.

    When clouds cover up a winter day
    she pulls out a comforter of memories
    and cuddles herself on the couch.

    The cocoa was better when someone else made it.

    But... this will get her by for now.
    It is not spiked with brandy or as hot,
    but it warms her soul somehow

    She'll leave the fireplace unlit for awhile.

    She knows how to prepare and survive
    for all of life's seasons because,
    loneliness and love can come and go

    like weather.




    Submitted on 2006-01-07 16:36:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I like the entire feel of the poem, very warm and nostalgic, certainly got me feeling sad but grateful for the people in my life who can never really make good cocoa, but never stop trying. The last line, "like weather", is just amazing. Delivers the punch just right. The atmosphere was certainly there, but the mention of the weather was completely unpredictable, though comes to be the most appropriate indeed! Nice mindstrings. I really like your work. Cheers!
    | Posted on 2006-02-04 00:00:00 | by shatila | [ Reply to This ]
      Hot cha-cha-chocolate! Mmmmm...
    This was quite the soothing piece Pristine Chrystine. I have those cloudy winter lay on the couch days too and this reminded me of those moments.

    In the second line of the last stanza whaddya think if you removed the word 'because'? Anyway, just my thought! Thanks.
    | Posted on 2006-01-11 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]
      This is just so sweet and touching ...I love it ..As magnicat said ..This just made me feel so warm and i wanted to go curl up on the couch with a hot chocolate and ponder....
    Thankyou for posting this ...It made me smile and cheered me up a little bit...its a comforting piece
    | Posted on 2006-01-09 00:00:00 | by Krysti | [ Reply to This ]
      very warm and comforting. reminds me of my aunt judy...she's that type of person...to just cuddle up on on a couch with a hot cocoa...:) beautiful imagery. lovely peice ma'am. keep writing

    XOxoXO,
    me
    | Posted on 2006-01-07 00:00:00 | by angelfyre | [ Reply to This ]
      it's always better when someone makes you the
    cocoa, isn't it, 'cause it's made with such love..
    'course, we can make it with love for ourselves as well..
    i like the ending, "loneliness and love can come and go
    like weather..." i do need to hear that...

    this made me want to light a candle, make myself some cocoa (without the brandy) and
    wrap myself in that comforter of memories.. right now, tho, the memories ache..
    but i loved your poem.

    peace&light,
    ~Cat
    | Posted on 2006-01-07 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]


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