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    dots Submission Name: screaming for fear of silent nightsdots

    Author: bloodied_angel
    ASL Info:    15/Female/Oklahoma
    Elite Ratio:    2.63 - 79/119/44
    Words: 227
    Class/Type: Story/Depressed
    Total Views: 725
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1228

       We are afraid to live, but scared to die
    - Inderpal Bahra

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsscreaming for fear of silent nightsdots

    Then she screamed. Her tears fell to mix with her crimson pain.
    "Are you still breathing?" He asked in anger.
    "No." She confessed.
    "Why then, do you linger here? Why do you not enter Zion? Do you fear salvation? Do you fear peace?" The rage in his tone slowly giving way to pitty.
    "No, I have no fear of my oun immortality. My only fear is that I will not see Zion but hell's flames and devils dance.
    "Why do you fear for your untouched spirit?"
    "My sins are numbered greater then the tears that have fallen into the sea."
    "Wraith, fear not if you do not enter Zion then when I succumb to the Pale Horse I will find you and bing you with me nirvana."
    "Mortal why would I trust you, you who have not experienced silence"
    "But, one day I will, and I ask that when I die you watch for me. I ask that if you enter nirvana I do not that you will do for me what I would do for you."
    "I agree mortal."
    "Then we agree for I tell I have spent many a restless night fearing for my undieing soul, now I may rest in peace."

    Submitted on 2006-01-09 17:31:42     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This is an interesting piece, i have to agree with CaptainRogers it's not necessarily the norm piece you tend to see but the change is welcomed. I like how the language in this it really made this a great read. Thanks for that.

    P.S. Thanks for your comment on "Darkness Child" it was much appreciated i agree with you about the ending it could do with some sprucing.
    | Posted on 2006-03-18 00:00:00 | by Flowerinbloom | [ Reply to This ]
      Interesting read, I don't see many poems in this style but it is a nice change from the generic format. I enjoy reading about what most would pressume to be darkness, when in actuality it is the life within us all along. <3
    | Posted on 2006-03-03 00:00:00 | by CaptainRogers | [ Reply to This ]
      this is really profond! and i love it! i love the way you say things without really saying them! and i loved the line
    "Her tears fell to mix with her crimson pain"
    Very special!
    | Posted on 2006-01-10 00:00:00 | by bambi144 | [ Reply to This ]
      its interesting. Its also kind of deep. I usually don't like this type of peoms, but this one is ok. I thnk that you should work on the flow a liite though. Also are you from India, or anywhere near it? just a question.
    | Posted on 2006-01-09 00:00:00 | by sweetme16 | [ Reply to This ]

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