Oh...I very much enjoyed this... I must say I was hooked form the first line'.. "summon the serpent to devour the virgin" and normaly I don't dig repetition but it helps instead of hinders with this poem.. You have inspired me to read some more of your work
summon the serpent... seedy snake eyes... kiss with a forked toungue... your constricting caress... slips your fangs deep...
the whole thing is beautiful but i especially love the way the first line of each stanza seems to indicate a progression in the seducation process... i also can't stand the whole "inbreeding scenester" bs... btw... i haven't been on in forever and haven't written much lately but look forward to cathching up on the pieces of yours i've missed... you rule!
wow this isn't bad at all. I like the creativity you used showing a serpent as sin and deceit. I also like how you included the bedroom stanza because most people sin in their bedrooms. lol. well that is what I think anyways. Good write
i think is really good. i love your choice of words, you create the images and convey your feelings on the topic very well. i also think it's a sign of how good of a writer you are when you can take something that so common and kind of obivious, like the snake being a sign of bad or evil and make it sound so originil. very nice job.