It should read:
Top Ten Reasons Why Gay Marriage Should be Illegal and they are as follows:
1. Being gay is not natural. Real americans always reject unnatural things such as glasses, polyester, and air conditioning.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will create all kinds of crazy behaviour. People might even want to marry their pets because a dog has a legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around for a long time and haven't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Britney Spears' 55 hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously gay parents will raise gay children since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on all of us...that's why we only have one religion in America.
9. Children can never suceed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundations of society; we will never adapt to new social norms just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, and longer life spans.
[credit to best of CL]