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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Days Like Thisdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Halston
    ASL Info:    20/female/carlsbad,ca
    Elite Ratio:    4.01 - 72/71/30
    Words: 116
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 1254
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 785



    Description:
       Don't we all have that good friend, that isn't so good any longer?

    Written at 14.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsDays Like Thisdots
    -------------------------------------------


    It's on a day like this
    the world could change
    or shake
    or move
    or break.

    It's on days like this I call an old friend
    and forget the ones that are broken and worn
    the ones who abandon me,
    for the next blue sky.

    It's on days like this
    I begin to believe,
    you've forgotten the sticky afternoons,
    and traded them for the drugs
    and other parts of your disguise.

    It's on days like this
    I can hold onto
    What escapes me.
    It meant my world folded like legs,
    Opened, and closed back again.

    It's on a day like this
    the world could change
    or shake
    or move
    or break.




    Submitted on 2006-01-16 17:32:21     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      That's a different way of describing losing a friend. I like it a lot. It's creative. My favorite part is:

    "It's on days like this
    I can hold onto
    What escapes me.
    It meant my world folded like legs,
    Opened, and closed back again."

    The wording is lovely
    I like how you ended it the way it started too.

    Great job

    -nikkki
    | Posted on 2006-01-16 00:00:00 | by Liv2LoveThePain | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a good poem. Nicely written and expressed and unique in the way you describe losing a friend. I know this feeling and it really does suck. It just seems to happen, whether it be from moving away, or just from growing apart, and no matter how hard you try, nothing seems to bring back the connection you once shared. It is a shame and not easy to deal with. You have described this well with your words. A sincere and good expression of feelings in this poem. Nice job. Take care.

    Lorna
    | Posted on 2006-02-04 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]


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