Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: These Wallsdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Star
    ASL Info:    15 F WI
    Elite Ratio:    2.69 - 125/127/42
    Words: 43
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 817
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 267



    Description:
       its just something that i wrote and hung on my door


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThese Wallsdots
    -------------------------------------------


    The secrets that these walls
    hold are secret even to me.
    The darkness that lies behind
    this door is the same that
    dwells within your mind.
    So if nightmares plauge you
    Do Not enter unless you plan
    to face them for real




    Submitted on 2006-01-16 19:46:24     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Very cool, I agree with Bleeding Tears, definitly trippy. I think you should move some of the words into different lines, such as moving hold up to the first line:
    "The secrets that these walls
    hold are secret even to me."
    | Posted on 2006-01-30 00:00:00 | by Glassy Eyed | [ Reply to This ]
      this is cool...i think its pretty trippy but thats what i like about it. yah i think thats cool how you said you put it on your door and yah..
    it does make some kind of mystery and thats the best part.
    its pretty short so i dont know what to say

    -BleedingTears
    | Posted on 2006-01-26 00:00:00 | by BleedingTears | [ Reply to This ]
      Pretty good poem though the ending wasn't that great. It seemed like the whole thing was building up for something and then just kinda let us down with the last part. Other then that good job
    | Posted on 2006-01-25 00:00:00 | by Akili | [ Reply to This ]
      i really like this piece...its short and to the point. it is full of emotion and truth. i can totally relate to this and everyone else probably can too. casue no matter how much we try to act normal, we all have secrets that we hide.
    | Posted on 2006-01-24 00:00:00 | by kession | [ Reply to This ]
      Short and sweet... thats right! It was short but absolutely friggin awesome! it was really a great write. i love the darkness in your words and the scaryness to the flow... definitely a great read! great job!
    | Posted on 2006-01-16 00:00:00 | by the_forgotten | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    87761

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry