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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Time Daggerdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Reckoner
    Elite Ratio:    5.04 - 122/164/128
    Words: 167
    Class/Type: Poetry/Longing
    Total Views: 229
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1067



    Description:
       Not sure if its finished...maybe a work in progress..


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTime Daggerdots
    -------------------------------------------


    The texture of your fingers
    Mixed with the warmth of the blood underneath
    Your grip, so tight around my chest
    Two hands playing with a deck of cards,
    Bleeding hearts,
    A jealous spade,
    And a crying imbecile,
    Stashing his woes under a drowning clover

    A full set of nobility without a throne room to gather
    Flipping the paper thin layers of my soul
    Wet with the liquid,
    From the bottom of your empty glass,
    They are beginning to tear
    We have both been weakened,
    Weighed down by a hundred hollow faces,
    Messy portraits of an intolerable waste

    Spraying your dreams across my shoulder blade
    Your words hit my shirt as droplets of blood
    Cheeks, still glistening from with the mark of your tongue
    I am helpless, but I am home
    Your body against me
    I close my eyes and curse this wretched time
    This infinite space
    Cluttered with the all hardened sorrow that only a lesser man could bring




    Submitted on 2006-01-16 21:51:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      hmmm....this ghostknight really reviewed alot of ur stuffs.. your words are so strong gare... i love. period.
    | Posted on 2006-08-29 00:00:00 | by angelfyre | [ Reply to This ]
      People seem to skip the good ones on this web site, I've noticed. Guess it requires too much thought. Or something. What?
    I read this one and smiled because I think I can sense the same emotion that inspired my "ratios"; the old cliché "so close, yes so far away"- the question I'm constantly faced with (from myself) is, would I rather be with someone for the traits on the surface or for the soul underneath? I swear I can't find a person who's got both... these lyrics are so reminiscent of that quandry.

    A full set of nobility without a throne room to gather
    Flipping the paper thin layers of my soul
    Wet with the liquid,
    From the bottom of your empty glass,

    All the right intentions, nowhere to guide them, so one is left exposing his soul to another in the hopes that some good will come out of it, even though we see that the person we are trying to reach is nothing but an empty vessel. Not usually good news, but, again, I'm led to my own thoughts of late: is it better to expose your soul to someone knowing that the person will never see it for the raw truth that it is, only absorb it like a sponge and ultimately strip it of all marks that would identify it as yours, and make it their own without giving equal, if any, back at all?
    By the way, this piece is very well written. To the open-minded reader there are many things being said right outside the lines that gives it so much strength. By the end of the poem it seems as though the feeling has come down two the fact that two people who would normally never be together for every reason humans can create are right there at the end, together. Partially inspiring, partially depressing. And since I'm on page 500 of this comment I'll call it a day. Enjoyed it. Adios.
    | Posted on 2006-01-30 00:00:00 | by ghostknight | [ Reply to This ]



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