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Betrayl.... The word traveled through my mind as him and I kissed. Thoughts of you covered my vision. The knowledge of what I was doing was there, yet I cared not, because if it weren't for you, I would never have done this. Revenge.... flashed into my mind. Thats not the person I care to be, yet I couldnt help it. Hurt rippled through my body as I recalled our last conversation... Traveling hands pull me from these thoughts. I look up to him and smile yet how could I with these thoughts running within my mind? He was there and there had still been a feeling left from a time before when it had been just me and him, an unfinished talks we had wished to complete...... Kissing and touching was as far as we went though. Thank god. I dont think I could've lived with those thoughts torturing me. As I sit here I know loving you may not be enough Do I tell or keep it to myself? |
whoa... that was some deep emotions in those words. Keep it coming! despite the unhappy mood of the poem, seeing this good of poetry makes me feel happy.| Posted on 2006-01-20 00:00:00 | by L0RIN | [ Reply to This ] | Hey, | Good write. The emotion was there. I'm not that good on advice though, srry. I like the way it flowed. *Let it Flow* Raven | Posted on 2006-01-20 00:00:00 | by Silent_Tears | [ Reply to This ] | I did enjoy this. I liked the optimistic feeling...like yeah this is what happend but I realize it could have been so much worse. It's nice. | | Posted on 2006-01-20 00:00:00 | by sandaledfeet | [ Reply to This ] | i really loved this. i loved how u did the betrayal and revenge thing. awesome job. i am sorry you had to go through something like that though. | *Crytsal* | Posted on 2006-01-20 00:00:00 | by lashelle | [ Reply to This ] | yes, i could've totally related to this poem acouple months back. being in situations like that can suck. but you learn from it, or sometimes something good can come from it. | | Posted on 2006-01-20 00:00:00 | by shotxgunxsinner | [ Reply to This ] | Good job..I liked it. I liked how u let it sort of trail off and then ended with a question. its dramatic and emotional...great job | | Posted on 2006-01-19 00:00:00 | by mysweetsuicide | [ Reply to This ] | Lovely.Good point.Upon the highest hopes, there are always regrets and dreams.I liked how you showed the unknown love feelings caught in a circle. | D` Alin | Posted on 2006-01-19 00:00:00 | by DAlin | [ Reply to This ] | |