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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: A Sad And Dismal Worlddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: dmm
    ASL Info:    50/M/Minnesota
    Elite Ratio:    3.81 - 741/888/102
    Words: 63
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1305
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 395



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsA Sad And Dismal Worlddots
    -------------------------------------------


    What a sad and dismal world would we tread,
    If as some wished those all different were dead.
    Cast aside because they prayed to the east,
    Held in contempt for savoring lifes feast.
    Pushed away for virtues deemed incorrect,
    Ridiculed and killed for their dialect.
    Forced to want for being of another hue,
    What a sad and dismal world for me and you.




    Submitted on 2006-01-21 12:43:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

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    ||| Comments |||
      Nicely written. It truly would be sad if their were no variety in our world and it truly IS sad when people neglect to notice the variety around them. Our world is a fascinating place with cultures, colors and ideas to fill several lifetimes. How sad to miss them!

    Steve
    | Posted on 2006-02-22 00:00:00 | by Lost Sheep | [ Reply to This ]
      a sad world indeed if we were all the same..
    how boring.. this is short and to the point and
    has a very powerful message.

    it's always amazed me how people can judge
    another human being simply by the colour of his/her
    skin or how they worship.. it is the beauty of
    these differences that i relish in.

    words of wisdom, Dan. thanks.

    peace,
    ~Cat
    | Posted on 2006-02-08 00:00:00 | by magnicat | [ Reply to This ]
      Why hello there! Havent heard from you in such a long time I figured I would stop by and see what new stuff you have posted. This is a very direct and truthful poem. Nicely written and expressed and I must agree with you. Such a sad world this has become. I often wonder why we all cant get along and just respect each other regardless of our origin and beliefs. The sad part is, I fear it will always be this way. Such a shame too. Imagine the world and how wonderful it could be? Very nice up front poem. Take care.

    Lorna
    | Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by lmz | [ Reply to This ]
      It's sad because "IT's" so beautiful and a lot don't appreciate this gift and can't see or don't care to see that heaven is here.
    I was just talking with my mom about some disgusting violent torture movie that's now #1 - and to me, it's like, where's the artistic value and the beauty - this is it - with all we have available to us this is what people want?
    Sad but we each tread our path and there's good out there we just have to see it.
    Great!
    Love,Peace,Joy&Smilez 2 share
    tif
    | Posted on 2006-01-23 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      Very good write Dan. No matter what color a person is, someone wants someone dead in this world of ours...and the line between killing for self survival and killing out of pure hate is a line too often blurred by lawyers, politicians, bleeding heart liberals and conservative arses. Take away all emotions associated with the people who fit into those characteristics and then the world will take one baby step towards not being so dismal. "Isnt that why animals were put on the planet, so that men could kill them for nourishment instead of each other? Oh, no...men arent supposed to kill animals, they are sacred!" *shrugs* What can ya do, ya know?
    | Posted on 2006-01-23 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]
      Hi Dan! How are you? I loved this poem because it spoke truth. You did not dance around it, or try to explain to deeply but let the facts speak for themsleves. I loved the way you did not just make this as if Americans are the only ones being effected by the war. This poem was poignant and well written. Very good Job Dan!

    Maggie
    | Posted on 2006-01-22 00:00:00 | by Magnolia Steele | [ Reply to This ]
      Dan, how goes it?

    Nice sentiment here, maybe a tad underdone, but I agree with your words. It's rather futile, eh? Sort of like the big question...and we keep asking it...

    Nice, mate

    be happy

    Graeme
    | Posted on 2006-01-21 00:00:00 | by wewak11 | [ Reply to This ]
      this is very nice Dan, but I would change it around if it were mine. some of the lines are a mouthful, although it's not bad-don't get me wrong. I just think it could be better. I know changing it would mean you might have to change the rhymes, but maybe you should just dispense with the rhyming. the message is what counts in this poem and it's a good one.

    what a sad and dismal world it is
    where some wish different ones were gone
    cast aside for praying to the east
    held in contempt for savoring life's feast

    I started not to rhyme and then did, but I'm sure you get my drift. make the words the music and don't write just to rhyme. anyway, it's a good poem and has enormous potential whatever you decide to do!
    | Posted on 2006-01-21 00:00:00 | by sierramuse8 | [ Reply to This ]
      Oh dan, this is really a touching to the core,and i disagree with Seele, the last two lines are perfect they they not only completed the poem but also complements it as well the feeling in this poem are powerful I loved it and thought it was short it was just right all at the same time,a longer piece would of taken away from it I think thanks for the read
    adnil
    | Posted on 2006-01-21 00:00:00 | by adnil | [ Reply to This ]
      my girlfiend doesnt like this poem. i guess its not entertaining enough foer. but i on the other hand get it . i understand where your coming from. and yea it sucks to be judged.
    | Posted on 2006-01-21 00:00:00 | by unclerob | [ Reply to This ]
      I agree with the message in this poem. 'A sad and dismal world', words of wizdom. !
    It's cool caus it's short which means it can help it to stick in your head better.
    Though the last two lines;

    'Forced to want for being of another hue,
    What a sad and dismal world for me and you.'

    don't quite flow well together. It sounds a bit forced.
    | Posted on 2006-01-21 00:00:00 | by Seele | [ Reply to This ]
      Dan I simply love this, a very profound write captured in a few words. As usual a natural flow, rhythm and rhyme that was simply grand.

    This seems to speak about how people are
    segregated because of their differences in language and religious views. It could also be interpreted as how people on a whole a broken into various fractions and dangerousness of prejudgement and discrimination. This piece just contains so much Dan and I just simply love that about it.

    You did real good here, keep up the great work and have a blessed and wonderful day.
    | Posted on 2006-04-15 00:00:00 | by Departed One | [ Reply to This ]


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    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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