Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Tequiladots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: smlaw
    ASL Info:    18/m/ny
    Elite Ratio:    4.48 - 56/37/10
    Words: 373
    Class/Type: Story/Misc
    Total Views: 836
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1885



    Description:
       


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTequiladots
    -------------------------------------------


    There was an undeniable anxiousness in the way that he acted, which he tried to cover by coolly taking a shot of tequila. He knew she could sense his nerves by the way his voice cracked as they struck up a conversation. She was in town for the week, visiting family; looking for someone to show her the town from someone besides her 55 year old aunt’s point of view. He started to turn red and get flustered.

    He had to down another shot of tequila. It was the one thing that would calm his nerves in this situation. He started to gather the courage to try and ask to buy her a drink (with what he realized was the last of his money). Yet even with that last shot, he knew that the second those words left his mouth he would want to crawl under the bar and just hide. There weren’t enough booze on all of Bourbon Street to save him from the humiliation he knew he would feel if she said now.

    He started to convince himself he’d get denied. Every guy gets denied by girls like her, with her flashing smile, glowing skin and clothes that were tight in all the right places. And it would be so cliché. Besides, even if she did accept: she’d take the drink, let him know he didn’t have a chance, walk away and leave him with only a penny and some lint in his pocket. If he was going to buy one last drink it was going to be a third shot of tequila, because that was his one hope of forgetting this entire night, and his lack luster performance in the field.

    He ordered that last shot and placed the last of his money on the counter, and made an off hand comment about how the bar had collected more money from him than the IRS. She gave a slight laugh and stood up to whisper in his ear before she left him alone at the bar

    “You know, I really thought you would be the first nice guy tonight to buy me a drink.”




    Submitted on 2006-01-21 23:30:06     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    88399

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry