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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Tainted Halodots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: SumN
    ASL Info:    16/Male/Missouri
    Elite Ratio:    3.86 - 17/22/6
    Words: 118
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 207
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 476



    Description:
       This Is my first piece of poetry written ever since i was about 12. I know that if you find the rhyme sequence and the emotion put into this you will enjoy it alot more then any normal poem.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsTainted Halodots
    -------------------------------------------


    -Soft And Frail Old And Weak
    Lost In Hells Golden Speech

    The Closing War Of Orchid Flowers
    Im Approaching Your Morbid Towers

    What Waits Is Faint And Scary
    At Front Gates Of Sanctuary's

    My Fear's Lost In The Open
    My Tear's Possibly Frozen

    Slavery Is Cold At The Furnace
    But Bravery Is Gold Epedermis-




    Submitted on 2006-01-23 19:05:31     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Wow, this poem was really nice. I liked how it just ended abruptly. I was expecting there to be more. This poem just kinda gave me the chills. It was great!

    Kris
    | Posted on 2006-01-25 00:00:00 | by Raindrops | [ Reply to This ]
      first off, the part I like the most "bravery is a gold epedermis" I like the reference to the scientific term instead of just sayng skin. This is confusing in it's own way, but portrays emotions well at the same time. for simplistic yet detailed work, this is damned good. good job, my only suggestion is to add more to it.
    | Posted on 2006-01-25 00:00:00 | by ThisIsReal | [ Reply to This ]
      enjoy reading your work. this and others. this poem seems both dark & industrial in your tone and rythme. i can sence u enjoy manipulating words.
    | Posted on 2006-01-25 00:00:00 | by vohomegirl | [ Reply to This ]
      This poem was very good.I found it to be very dark yet deep.The flow and ryhme was right on.Tough to do at times.Good job.

    |+|Candace|+|
    | Posted on 2006-01-23 00:00:00 | by ArtichokeMosher | [ Reply to This ]
      first poem since you were 12?? heh. it doesn't seem like it.

    What Waits Is Faint And Scary
    At Front Gates Of Sanctuary's


    thats my favorite part. nice job. keep writing more! I'd like to read more. cuz this was really good. and I liked the rhyming.
    | Posted on 2006-01-23 00:00:00 | by MyKemicalfailur | [ Reply to This ]



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    January 10 07
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