Description: yes prolly really confusing huh well it was about love at first bite oh i mean sight. Well ne ways i dont expect really ne one to like it so let me know what i can do to fix it or make it better ok thanks.
An Arrow Through The Heart -------------------------------------------
An arrow thorugh the heart.
I've been caught.
All alone deep in thought.
You captured my attention.
And forgot to mention.
You were alone to.
My heart called for you.
At first i payed you no thought.
All about you i forgot.
Not knowing how you felt.
When i noticed you i melt.
Into the blackest see.
That you saw as me.
The ugly everyone seen.
Was different in your eyes.
The individual freak
That you did not ignore.
Did you notice me before?
What was your first thought?
When you saw me and forgot.
The world around you.
You couldnt even see.
Anything past me.
I was so fascinated.
And you were so fixated.
An arrow throughthe heart.
I've been caught.
All alone deep in thought.
You captured my ayyention.
And forgot to mention.
You were alone to.
I Love it. It made me so sad though. It rhymed at all the right times and flowed perfectly. I would normally point out my favorite part, but I love the whole thing too much to just pick one. So I'll be on my way now Great job
hey babe i read this one awhile back and i just got back on here i really like this poem not only becasue its about me and you but becasue its very well written and i enjoy reading your work i love you babe and have fun
hmmm, very good i think. YOu stayed on topic, and i especially liked the repetition of certain lines. YOu did very well! why no one has commented, that i do ont know. It was a good poem and i believe it deserves more. just to mention you had a couple of spelling errors, but nothin' major, so you don't have to fix them it's fine with or without them, :)
Submission Name: An Arrow Through The Heart
