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    dots Submission Name: The Enddots

    Author: darkened_soul
    Elite Ratio:    3.38 - 812/868/171
    Words: 188
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1011
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1277

       I haven't wrote anything in a while. This is a majoy come-back poem for me.

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThe Enddots

    Sitting on the window sill
    Staring past the glistening glass
    Watching her climbing into the taxi
    Hoping this will pass.

    Asking "how did it get this way?"
    "Why couldn't we work it out?"
    "Why didn't we talk about it?"
    "Why did we have to shout?"

    Knowing you made a big mistake
    One that ruined it all
    8 years to build it up
    Now, you're watching it fall.

    Still able to remember
    When you first started to date
    How you were always on time
    She never had to wait.

    Still able to remember
    How she smiled at you when
    You'd tell her that you loved her
    That she was your best friend.

    But one day, in her bright blue eyes
    Fogging with growing tears
    You know she no longer felt it
    It had faded after the years.

    You see the lights flashing
    The taxi drives away
    You just wish she still loved you
    That she had the strength to stay.

    Still sitting on the window sill
    Staring past the glistening glass
    Slowly, as you start to cry,
    You realize, this won't pass.

    Submitted on 2006-01-24 14:12:05     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      This was a very sad write. Good thoughts ideas and flow. Im with tif thought that line didnt really make sense and there was a typo. Other than that great write!
    | Posted on 2006-01-24 00:00:00 | by nasuka | [ Reply to This ]
      welcome another person from ontario canada not 2 many of us on this site this was good in its own way i dont think i've read anything like it before no bad intent given
    good read and good write
    | Posted on 2006-01-24 00:00:00 | by sandman | [ Reply to This ]
      Impactful piece on love and loss - what once was but will never be again. This was the second in a row I read with similiar theme but different ways of expressing it & I enjoyed this piece too!
    It's not fraught with emotion but shows how somethings we think are for sure in life can change.
    Just a suggestion, but this line, "You the the lightd flashing" has a typo & doesn't make sense.
    Love,Peace,Joy&Smilez 2 share
    | Posted on 2006-01-24 00:00:00 | by Epiphany | [ Reply to This ]
      I can tell from this peice its not a perspective you seem too use to. although admittedly its an amazing write, that much is clear. but it still seems slightly I don't know... out of place I suppose. I'm not sure how to explain myself quite well enough to be understood. either way I look forward to more recent works being added.

    (p.s stop by my page rainbow girl ;-) see if you know who I am from it)
    | Posted on 2006-08-18 00:00:00 | by speedrocketguit | [ Reply to This ]
      This was a sad poem. I can't think of any bad things to say about it because it all looks great to me. I agree with tif, it's an impactful piece on love and loss. Did this happen to you or someone you know, or was it just a poem you made up?
    Well anyway, great write.

    | Posted on 2006-01-25 00:00:00 | by Lavender | [ Reply to This ]

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