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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Carson Hilldots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Indigo Kid
    ASL Info:    33/f/everywhere
    Elite Ratio:    3.73 - 428/438/115
    Words: 132
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 1070
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 828



    Description:
       I don't normally like to rhyme, but here I am, doing it again! I took a trip with my BF to see his family history in MO. It was so cool!


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsCarson Hilldots
    -------------------------------------------


    Driving on that hill etched
    with your family name;
    decades of love and
    a tiny bit of shame.

    The history of you and
    those who are deceased;
    To be in that family tree
    would make me so pleased.

    The pride I had next to you
    while taking in the sights
    made me forget our issues
    and all those nasty fights.

    Your beautiful eyes and just
    the funny way you are
    became so clear to me that
    one day in the car.

    Your mysterious ways that
    entice me to never want to drift;
    That is no mistake by God,
    but a pure genetic gift.

    Now it is so apparent
    that thing I did not know.
    It was fates sweet history
    that made me love you so.





    Submitted on 2006-01-27 00:17:29     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      Your words are beautiful, and the simplest plans always work best anyway. You deserve... um... Well, I don't have what good things you deserve, but I do have... um... lint. Sorry. It's great, but I'm poor.
    | Posted on 2006-01-27 00:00:00 | by racconeyes | [ Reply to This ]
      WHY ARE YOU SO GOOD! I'm beginning to plot on how to completely steal your talent. The only suggestions I can make is that it was a bit hard to understand exactly what is happening. Other than that, I think it is a great peice, and I would add it to my favorites if I knew how...
    | Posted on 2006-01-27 00:00:00 | by Imadjinn | [ Reply to This ]
      Woah! I like it when you rhyme! Hee-hee! You do it so well and this was a very nice tale. I really thought the last two lines in the first stanza were marvelous. Great stuff maynard and thanks for sharing!
    | Posted on 2006-01-27 00:00:00 | by hyproglo | [ Reply to This ]
      Perfect
    Thou you said you do not usually write in the rhyme scheme
    you wrote this write very well
    I can feel the love you and your soulmate share
    I pray you both live a beautiful life together
    God Bless
    Ron
    | Posted on 2006-01-27 00:00:00 | by Ronswords | [ Reply to This ]
      yes, thatis the best way to describethis poem,it so real. I think you trying to get all the men to fall in love with you,lol

    It has a simple grace to it,bravo, good write
    | Posted on 2006-01-28 00:00:00 | by edthepoet | [ Reply to This ]
      Aw, how sweet. I like the way you wrote this. It's not just poetic, but human and real, with a slight bit of humor.

    Our history speaks a lot about who we are today. You express that well in this poem.


    "Your mysterious ways that
    entice me to never want to drift;
    That is no mistake by God,
    but a pure genetic gift." < good one

    I enjoyed!
    ~Sandra
    | Posted on 2006-01-27 00:00:00 | by Intricate1 | [ Reply to This ]


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    89038

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.


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