Calling Up From The Basement
I am that which hasn’t been invented yet.
The girl I love is that which hasn’t been invented yet.
Sometimes I say goodbye prematurely.
Sometimes I look right into people’s eyes
And want them to uncover my secrets.
What a fine batch of secrets!
It’s hotter today than I expected.
My head hurts fiercely.
Last night I drank too much.
Tonight I plan to not drink enough.
Marijuana cigarettes lay there, lonesome.
My love is in California.
There’s a lot of things in California.
Someday I plan to go there
And try a taste of the good life.
I am free to do all things.
The world lies at my feet.
All women secretly desire to go to bed with me.
My wisdom abounds like rainbows.
My window is a bit dirty.
I walk up to my window
And light up a cigarette, Humphrey Bogart style.
It’s raining like a bastard.
Vaguely, it thunders in the distance.
The cigarette burns down to my fingers.
The heavens part once again.
Last night I dreamed I jumped out of a tenth story building
And wasn’t killed.
Some people have all the sex they need.
They move on to greener pastures.
Off and on, I have been certain
Of the presence of a superior intelligence and have said so.
I am willing to believe all things.
I spend four hours a day staring at the wall.
I spend eight hours a day trying to please others.
I spend the better part of the day sleeping.
I talk as little as possible with strangers.
The television provides sprightly entertainment.
Five times I was fortunate enough
To receive four poorly timed rejections.
It brought me to my senses.
Six times my telephone rings.
I’m lucky to be alive.
I have two locks on my door.
I plan to discontinue phone service.
Once I rode in an ambulance
And wasn’t killed.
I have two pet animals.
One is a dog and the other is a cat.
They are afraid of each other for no reason.
I talk to them as if they are human.
I have no friends.
I have a man I talk to once a week
At a time of mutual convenience.
I’m all better now.
I’m almost too good to be true.
Today I plan to buy a tantalizing new after shave lotion.
There is a girl downstairs
Who is strictly for sexual purposes.
The world just became perfect.
I smile with the power of Zeus.
Dammit, I’m going to take a marijuana cigarette
And smoke it out the left side of my mouth Humphrey Bogart style.
I have all the sex I need.
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Submission Name: Calling Up From the Basement
