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    dots Submission Name: This Long Roaddots

    Author: inkpen
    ASL Info:    19
    Elite Ratio:    4.12 - 391/199/61
    Words: 163
    Class/Type: Poetry/Misc
    Total Views: 1238
    Average Vote:    5.0000
    Bytes: 1066

       I just wrote this, right here. Trying to get my poem writingness back. Lol, I just finished the last part. Its trying to say that you dont have to walk a road your whole life, you can go your own way. Whatever.What category would this go in?

    Tell me what you think. Thanks!

    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsThis Long Roaddots

    This long road I walk
    Dusty with exsistence
    As the suns setting in
    I see no footprints

    Its a little bit scary
    You know?
    Walking on a lonely road
    With no where else to go

    Theres no where to hide
    No clouds up above
    Just a long road
    Without any love

    It's not concrete
    But dirt
    It's not in the forest
    But in the desert

    I've been walking for so long
    Walking this everlasting way
    It seems I've not gotten very far
    The truth is I've walked for a day

    Whos road am I walking?
    I force myself on with invisible oars
    And I say to myself
    This road is not mine, it is yours

    I dont have to walk this road
    It doesn't belong to me
    I'm stepping away
    And giving my road to thee

    Theres a note on the ground
    I shuffle away
    Written in ink
    You can walk your own way

    Submitted on 2006-01-28 09:08:52     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Wow! I almost cried! Literally. This is beautiful and riveting. I feel like I am walking as the girl/ boy in the poem. Your writing completely swept me away. It is just so moving! It's deep. Really. I feel like I can really relate. At first the poor person is just walking, trodding, forcing herself forward and I think, poor girl, but then it seems she grows in strength of mind and shoves that hardship away, refusing to keep the burden on her shoulders--or under her feet--any longer. Simply amazing! I wish you hadn't deleted the rest of your old work, for I would've loved to read them! Oh well, I look forward to seeing your work in print someday.
    | Posted on 2008-03-28 00:00:00 | by SweetAndOhSoME | [ Reply to This ]
      I felt as If I were this person, so lost and confused, with where I was. I felt lonely and out of touch with the world. This poem has great imagery! It flows so well. You really do a good job at portraying someone other than yourself. Great piece inkpen! :)
    | Posted on 2006-02-20 00:00:00 | by __symphony__ | [ Reply to This ]
      One thing I noticed with this poem, is you have very good imagry in your words, I can see a person walking, and I understand how It's hard to tell which road you belong on. Your words flow very well

    Theres a note on the ground
    I shuffle away
    Written in ink
    You can walk your own way

    Keep up the good work!
    | Posted on 2006-02-02 00:00:00 | by Dark Muse | [ Reply to This ]
      its a really good piece. I read like 2 times to fully realize what your are talking about. I don't think that you should change anything about this. good job
    | Posted on 2006-01-28 00:00:00 | by sweetme16 | [ Reply to This ]
      Holy Crap. I had to read this twice just to realize that not all of the stanzas had the same rhyme scheme. That Flowed extremely well, and I only want more. Change nothing about your style. Your poem is officially...FAVORITED.
    | Posted on 2006-01-28 00:00:00 | by Imadjinn | [ Reply to This ]
      This is an amazing piece it truly has an underlying message stating that one must remain independant and individual to oneself...Life sometimes does instil on us personalities stronger than our own though which either by fear or by misguided love we tend to stray from our personal life path... the strength in realising that this has happened and rectifying it builds character and inner strength well written and nice imagery.

    Timmy S. Edgar
    | Posted on 2006-01-28 00:00:00 | by Timmy S. Edgar | [ Reply to This ]

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