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    dots Submission Name: untitleddots

    Author: Sarah Leger
    ASL Info:    15.f.kissimmee,Fl
    Elite Ratio:    3.74 - 436/387/80
    Words: 181
    Class/Type: Misc/Misc
    Total Views: 938
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1275


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.


    Sit here
    Wait to fear
    Stomach on fire
    Burning far too bold
    It all crashes down
    When you put your ear to the ground
    And hear a heartbeat
    So soft
    So mellow
    But there
    Enough to make you scared
    Can't run away
    It's inside you
    Can't stay
    It'll soon break free from you
    Choose to love it
    Without the choice
    Moral standing
    Raises it's voice
    Everyone looks away
    Whispers in anothers ear
    Tells of their doubts
    Just to further instill fear
    Make your bed
    Now lie in it
    Make your bed
    Now die in it
    Your advice comes too late
    But it feels great
    Just to know how much you care
    or don't
    What happened?
    To when you believed I could
    Out the window?
    Just as soon as I have to
    it's gone?
    Your faith
    my dreams.
    I know what it means.
    But the only belief I need
    is mine.
    Long since over
    are we
    But now I see
    that still I must break free.

    Submitted on 2006-01-28 14:49:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      They way you wrote it made me feel like this could be a song. I liked how you answered your own questions in your poem because it just makes you think more about what your writing.

    Tells of their doubts

    Is it suppose to be tales?

    Your poem had an idea right after the other and then the other and so on which made it interesting. Lovely.

    | Posted on 2006-01-30 00:00:00 | by poeticblindness | [ Reply to This ]
      this is really cool and i think it would make a pretty good song. but thats just me..
    i like the way its formatted because it gives it a trippy feel along with the write its self.
    it seems like a venting piece and i really liked it.
    nice job.

    | Posted on 2006-01-28 00:00:00 | by BleedingTears | [ Reply to This ]
      Some beautiful poetry you have here. I enjoyed this piece with every word I read. I liekd the format of things too, it made it flow better that it would if it were just regular stanzas for some reason. I can also relate to it alot, too. I'm adding this to my favorite's list. Keep it up, I want to hear more of your stuff.
    | Posted on 2006-01-28 00:00:00 | by Toxic_Rayne | [ Reply to This ]

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