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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Follow your path; I'm heredots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: Ana_Mad
    ASL Info:    21/Female/Maine, USA
    Elite Ratio:    6.59 - 33/33/17
    Words: 46
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 833
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 349



    Description:
       This is a very breif poem that I wrote for one certain person. I was in the car going to go pick up my new pair of glasses, doing a lot of thinking about everything that has been going on in my life and all the feelings I've been having. One person kept coming into my mind and then, closely followed by the thought of him, this poem came and I wrote it down in a mess of scrawling messy handwriting on a bit of napkin with a mostly dead pen that I kept having to shake and try other tricks to get it to work so I could get this down on paper.


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    dotsFollow your path; I'm heredots
    -------------------------------------------


    Go wherever
    Thought may lead you
    Fret not about
    The path your dreams choose.

    For whichever direction
    Life may take you
    Here with you
    I'll forever remain

    Even if love should leave,
    Take you away from me
    Faithfully by your memory
    I'll forever stay.




    Submitted on 2006-02-01 16:40:30     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      I really liked it. I know exactly what you were feeling when you wrote this. Love is a hard thing to deal with, even when things are going okay, because you know, in the back of your mind, that someday they may not.

    I've been under a lot of stress lately, over this girl, but I realized that I don't need her. I don't need her to be happy. The days that I don't think about her are fantastic. My stomach feels great, and except for my skin starting to break out, I'm perfect. I've found somebody, who you may know, that I think I could spend the rest of my life with. :)

    The piece is very short, but I think, sometimes, that's okay. Good work Ana, I'm looking forward to reading more.

    Stay Strong,
    Nessa
    | Posted on 2006-02-03 00:00:00 | by Zabriel | [ Reply to This ]
      The loyalty behind this was admirable, but the theme as a poem, I felt, needed more. Maybe if you expand each thought as to how he would travel far (to study/work..) when he returned, you'd be there. And remove the full stop in verse one.

    DeepDreamer2008
    | Posted on 2006-02-01 00:00:00 | by DeepDreamer2008 | [ Reply to This ]


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