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    dots Submission Name: Solidarity's Mistake and My...dots

    Author: emo-tastic
    Elite Ratio:    3.54 - 571/566/128
    Words: 217
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 1213
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 1455


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    dotsSolidarity's Mistake and My...dots

    “Solidarity’s Mistake and My Showdown with Rockefeller”

    So listen up
    I’ve held these words in too long
    watching you and her and me and them fall, fail
    unfazed, I save up selfish verses
    that are too feeble to come out.

    I sit on kitchen floors
    (still warm though it’s the dead of winter)
    watching the water seep out
    of refrigerators left on too long
    but somehow I can’t understand the words you’re speaking
    and my emotions seep out
    like some overripe apple that can’t be split in half.

    Worrying once again that my thoughts are clichéd
    and ill-written I stop myself from writing them
    or thinking them out loud
    (settling to judge the work of others—
    citing excuses that the form is outofplace
    and the content is mediocre—)
    but some see through it
    and still allow me to flounder around
    papers on Chinese Immigration,
    letting my imagination harness itself to the
    transcontinental railroad.

    My hours of outpouring result in paragraphs
    so small we can’t read them
    and she tries to explain what I know I can explain
    but my eyes have glazed over from trying to read
    my paragraphs on Rockefeller and
    people long dead.

    Solidarity’s demise reminds
    of the words I’ve written
    too small to read.

    Submitted on 2006-02-03 22:37:36     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
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    ||| Comments |||
      I loved this poem.

    Except in stanza four, it felt a little bit like you were showing off, not really writing, just wanting everyone to think that you know something. A little too metaphysical-poet debate for me to enjoy it.

    I really loved the second line in stanza two. In fact, that entire stanza is excellent.

    And of course, the end is just perfect. I can't even put it into words.
    | Posted on 2006-02-03 00:00:00 | by Janelle | [ Reply to This ]

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