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    poetry


    dots Submission Name: untitleddots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: fallen_angel384
    ASL Info:    17/Female/uk
    Elite Ratio:    3.26 - 59/87/22
    Words: 79
    Class/Type: Poetry/Cutting or Mutilation
    Total Views: 294
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 478



    Description:
       one of my friends wrote this in her maths lesson i thought it was really good for a first but she wanted to know what other people think of it so i said i'd put it on here for her she couldn't think of a name for it so... yea... lol er....
    Btw shes not a cutter she wrote this one about me...

    izzi x


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsuntitleddots
    -------------------------------------------


    For everytime you tell yourself no!
    you can't hold it in, just seem to let go.
    The blade goes smoothly under your skin.
    this is the place where we all begin,
    At first you get soaked in terror and pain,
    then after a month never again.
    it becomes a tradition,
    somthing usual,
    you do it every night,
    not knowing how deep you go,
    when suddenly you go too far,
    end up in hospital and never come out.




    Submitted on 2006-02-06 09:01:43     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      yer friend is an excellent poet.please tell her she is great.i love poems like this i mean ones i can really relate to.like i said it twas good.
    | Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by LostInYerTears | [ Reply to This ]
      tell her nice job. Pretty good description for someone who isn't a cutter or a write i guess. I am a cutter, or a revoering one, it's been almost 99 days since my last...and i've thought many times abotu going back. Use your friend as a tool to help you stop, tha'ts what i've been doing. Maybe you'll stop too, if such a good friend would write this abtou you.
    | Posted on 2006-02-06 00:00:00 | by Mercy December | [ Reply to This ]
      Yes do tell her that, she seems very worried about you it shows in her words. I could feel her pain her anguish. It was very clear, her message her feelings everything. The word choice was a little off,but I don't think I'd change it much, It seems both origional Your always hearing poems about someones pain and how hurt they feel, you never really see many poems about someone else, it seems almost selfish to do so. Tell your friend she's good.
    | Posted on 2006-02-06 00:00:00 | by Drain_my_Blood | [ Reply to This ]
      Ouch! I felt that blade!

    Read both, this one and the other untitled one, by your friend. Please tell her that she's GOOD...

    She should come onto this page on her own.
    I beleieve she should certainly be able to hold her own, amongst others who share their writings here!
    Regards,
    Psyve
    | Posted on 2006-02-06 00:00:00 | by Psyve | [ Reply to This ]
      sorry to disagree with the others, but I don't think this poem was that good. there are so many poems like this and this one does not add something. It was not original, but the ending did surprise me a little. I have not read a poem yet were the person ends up in a hospital so maybe that was the only original part in it. I don't think your friend is a bad poet, but she should consider to write with a little bit more effort and inspiration perhaps..

    Darth
    | Posted on 2006-03-11 00:00:00 | by Darth Zeus | [ Reply to This ]



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