Writingpoetry

[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

dotsdots
nav
  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav



    nav
  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav



    << | >>
    poetry


    dots Submission Name: Ying & Yan Paintingdots
    --------------------------------------------------------





    Author: bleeding-soul
    ASL Info:    17/m/al
    Elite Ratio:    4.22 - 94/94/14
    Words: 81
    Class/Type: Poetry/Serious
    Total Views: 757
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 523



    Description:
       I sort of got the inspiration for this from my friend Jazmine.


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsYing & Yan Paintingdots
    -------------------------------------------


    She paints a picture of her life
    Mixture of colors
    Happiness and sadness
    Anger and hate

    On the canvus is painted a heart
    Split in two
    Half of it perfect
    The other half scarred

    In a mixture of grey and white
    A house is painted
    It symbolizes love and security
    Yet fires burns within

    Deep within the painting
    Lies the story of a girl
    With all the love in her heart
    And all the burdens of the world




    Submitted on 2006-02-07 10:44:02     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!




    ||| Comments |||
      This reminds me of a song

    "And though she's beautiful in photographs,
    I absolutely love her, when she smiles."

    Those are two of the lyrics of the song, but i don't remember the part that reminds me of your poem...

    Oh well,
    This was a cool write for what it was, its sad, but to me, very cliché...The standard girl, or guy, carrying the burden of the world, heart cracked in two, all seems very standard pop song like to me, and I dont' think that's what you were going for.

    Lia
    | Posted on 2007-01-08 00:00:00 | by Glassy Eyed | [ Reply to This ]
      Yeah, this was a great poem!
    I liked it as well. The symbols, the metaphors.
    Deep and good.
    Lovely!
    Do please come and check mine out some day when you have the time!

    I just had to add, that the title that caught my eyes very quickly. A great title..
    Black and white. Arent we all?
    | Posted on 2006-02-13 00:00:00 | by ChrystalR | [ Reply to This ]
      This is nice. I can't really write about Jaz in these terms. I can't step back and look at it objectively, I'm too wrapped up in her. This is a lovely poem, though. Thanks for your comments...
    | Posted on 2006-02-09 00:00:00 | by Raivn | [ Reply to This ]
      This was splendid Steven. Even better than you described on the phone and I am deeply flattered that I was on your mind and heart enough to inspire you to write this. YOu are such a good friend and a really talented writer. YOu get me.


    Luv
    Jaz
    | Posted on 2006-02-08 00:00:00 | by lori_tab | [ Reply to This ]
      The poem is a great symbolism. ying and yang arent just oposites. The dots represent the fact that in every bit of ying there is yang and every bit of ying is yang. in someones live ther happiness and sadness making the whole. The poem speak to me of balancing emotions,priorities etc.
    | Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by Bloomsbury Set | [ Reply to This ]
      i liked this piece a lot. keep up the amazingly awesome work. i truly hope to read more by you in the future. keep writing. i know you can go somewhere big with your work.
    love
    tina
    | Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by ladiesplanet1 | [ Reply to This ]
      This is a great poem, well written, and I think it's one of the best poems that I have read that was written by you. The flow suits the poem well. It sounds like it's about a friend, or a portrayal of yourself in third person. Keep posting man!
    | Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by Draigon | [ Reply to This ]


    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?



    90403

    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.

    Love written by saartha
    the living moment written by ShyOne
    to Be like written by KeeperOfLight
    Shi written by ShyOne
    Formal Jen written by Daniel Barlow
    Yes written by poetotoe
    Cover written by saartha
    descent written by TheBadSadMan
    PEARL (Exclusive Poem) 10th Anniversary... written by Cordell
    You read free written by poetotoe
    4th Season of Vivaldi written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Primitive Lapse written by Crestfallenman
    My Four Seasons written by faideddarkness
    The Old Mill written by Wolfwatching
    winners circle written by ShyOne
    Fasade written by jackz
    Cosmic Dreams written by Chelebel
    World I No Longer Want written by ForgottenGraves
    Physician, Heal Thyself written by WriteSomething
    the testing of hypotheses written by Daniel Barlow
    untitled written by ShyOne
    Silent Screams In Silent Dreams written by poetotoe
    Etiquette written by saartha
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (7) written by endlessgame23
    More then just goodbye written by faideddarkness
    Records I written by Raphael
    The Unicorn written by BlazeFlamme
    The Severed Head written by HisNameIsNoMore
    Supernatural Cowboy Sleuth (2) written by endlessgame23
    prison written by ShyOne

    Google
     


    poetry

    dotsLogindots

    User Name:

    Password:

    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]


    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems
    Posted

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]



    FontSize:
    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]
     Poetry