Secret Message by Saint

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Submission Name: Secret Message dots

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Author:	Saint
ASL Info:	21/Male/Boston, MA
Elite Ratio:	3.41 - 87/119/30
Words:	86

Class/Type:	Poetry/Love
Total Views:	267
Average Vote:	No vote yet.
Bytes:	522

Description:
Mi Amor= My love

This is dedicated to the sorrow of my life.

Secret Message dots

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My love for you is eternal
I am forever yours
Venture with me once more
In time you will see the path
Destiny awaits us my love
A future you know is true
Escape is not an option
See now we must succeed
Take my hand once more
Until death rips us apart
Milady, my love, my sanctum
Illusion you are not
Let our legacy unravel
Insufferable fate we face
Take this ride towards our future
And love me as I love you mi amor

Submitted on 2006-02-07 12:17:42 Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

1: >_<
2: I dunno...
3: meh!
4: Pretty cool
5: Wow!

||| Comments |||
  Well, I guess I have to comment on this since I added it to my favorites =P. Keeping in mind the "secret message", and going along with the "escape is not an option", I guess you've proven once again that you are a persistent h.d.p. Definitely a change from your more dark, gothic type poems that I can't stand reading just cuz they make me so sad. Good job. ...bb...

XoXo
~Tayla~
| Posted on 2006-02-12 00:00:00 | by Phoenix2004 | [ Reply to This ]
  a choppy sappy and sweet write. it seems you sped through the planning process and just wrote. I like the milady, i just liked it. nice job.
| Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by SincerWritinAsh | [ Reply to This ]
  an adequate description of love. its almost as if it takes over and controls you. Neat use of various tools, such as using "mi amor". Kudos, good write! perhaps a bit choppy, but otherwise very good.
| Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by BreakAndFall | [ Reply to This ]
  This is really lovely and i understand and like the sentiments portrayed..but i have to say it feels kind of suffocating..."escape not an option"...as though the people are trapped...lol...i presume you mean they feel destined etc...i guess it depends how you read it... :)...stormy
| Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by stormyskies | [ Reply to This ]
  Really nice, short, but caring write. I can understand it very well. and I'm with Glassy Eyed on the lines,

"A future you know is true
Escape is not an option"

Very nice lines I believe.

The last I have to say is about the "Mi Amor" part. I think that it should be in quotes like someone was saying it... but that's me, you don't have to change it. THNX

- Nammy
| Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by Namlooc20 | [ Reply to This ]
  This was really sweet and beautiful. A change for your usual sad based poems. It's nice.
A future you know is true
Escape is not an option
I really like those 2 lines. Nice job:)
| Posted on 2006-02-07 00:00:00 | by Glassy Eyed | [ Reply to This ]

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