[ Join Free! ]
(No Spam mail)

  • RolePlay
  • Join Us
  • Writings
  • Shoutbox
  • Community
  • Digg Mashup
  • Mp3 Search
  • Online Education
  • My Youtube
  • Ear Training
  • Funny Pics
  • nav

  • Role Play
  • Piano Music
  • Free Videos
  • Web 2.0
  • nav

    << | >>

    dots Submission Name: Painful Sobsdots

    Author: kissingadict
    ASL Info:    18//F//CT
    Elite Ratio:    3.47 - 110/136/32
    Words: 95
    Class/Type: Poetry/Love
    Total Views: 653
    Average Vote:    No vote yet.
    Bytes: 617


    Make the font bigger!! Double Spacing Back to recent posts.

    dotsPainful Sobsdots

    She could feel it in her bones.
    It had never hurt this much,
    But couldn’t put her finger on it.
    Two bodies so in tune,
    She was tormented, and felt the pain,
    Before as much as a sound
    Escaped from his sweet mouth.

    The silence was heart-wrenchingly deafening.
    Warm tears streaming down her face,
    Silent screams and repentant sobs
    Tore her core apart, and left her shamefully naked.

    She was desperate to fall back asleep,
    And wake up to the realization that this nightmare
    Was merely a frightful dream.

    Submitted on 2006-02-08 19:45:11     Terms of Service / Copyright Rules
    Submissions: [ Previous ] [ Next ]

    Rate This Submission

    1: >_<
    2: I dunno...
    3: meh!
    4: Pretty cool
    5: Wow!

    ||| Comments |||
      Wow, this was great, to me it spoke of heartbreak or someone dying maybe im wrong but thats what it said to me.

    She was tormented, and felt the pain,
    Before as much as a sound
    Escaped from his sweet mouth.

    this is my favourite part.

    Keep up the good work
    | Posted on 2006-02-08 00:00:00 | by babytinkerbelle | [ Reply to This ]

    Think Feedback more than Compliments :: [ Guidelines ]

    1. Be honest.
    2. Try not to give only compliments.
    3. How did it make you feel?
    4. Why did it make you feel that way?
    5. Which parts?
    6. What distracted from the piece?
    7. What was unclear?
    8. What does it remind you of?
    9. How could it be improved?
    10. What would you have done differently?
    11. What was your interpretation of it?
    12. Does it feel original?


    Be kind, take a few minutes to review the hard work of others <3
    It means a lot to them, as it does to you.




    User Name:


    [ Quick Signup ]
    [ Lost Password ]

    January 10 07
    131,497 Poems

    I have 14,000+ Subscribers on Youtube. See my Video Tutorials

    [ Angst Poetry ]
    [ Cutters ]
    [ Famous Poetry ]
    [ Poetry Scams ]

    [ Smaller ] [ Bigger ]